Surviving Litchfield

Chapter Sixteen: Unbelievable

On Saturdays, inmates were allowed visitation. Whoever you had on your visitation list was allowed to come and see you for a while. I almost forgot about this, as nobody ever visited me. It's sad, isn't it? After being in prison for a few months, I still hadn't seen my parents, sister, or best friend. Bailey was on the list as well, but I doubted she'd come to see me since we broke up.

A week and a half after sending Stella to max, I was called for visitation. I nearly choked. Who could be here to see me? Any of the possible visitors on my list (excluding Bailey, of course) would have some major explaining to do after ditching me for months. Sighing, I walked to the unfamiliar room to greet my guest.

The visitation room was quite large with tables and chairs all around. A guard was present, probably to keep track of how the inmates were behaving. There was even a small room with two vending machines.

I peered through the window a second longer to track down a familiar face. When I saw my sister sitting alone at an empty table, I decided to join her. I put my anger aside and walked into the room.

My sister, Alyssa, smiled widely as I sat across from her. I don't think it was possible for me to look any less enthusiastic. I leaned back in my seat, placing my hands on my legs. How long was this going to take? I wanted nothing more than to get away from her.

"What the fuck took you so long?" I asked as I watched her expression quickly change.

"I was doing the best that I could to come see you." She said, looking very hurt. "Mom and dad are the ones who don't want to visit, not me. I've been waiting for them to come around, but since they haven't, I decided to visit you on my own."

I frowned, leaning forward and resting my elbows on the table. She seemed to be telling the truth, and that hurt more than I expected it to. My parents really didn't want to see me, did they?

"It's because I'm in prison, isn't it?" I sighed and leaned my head onto my right hand. Of course it was. They didn't want to see their precious, intelligent daughter incarcerated.

Alyssa just shrugged and smiled sympathetically. "I wish I could answer that, but I really don't know. They've hardly even mentioned you since you came here. Whenever I bring up visiting, they always say something about how they're too busy."

I looked down at the brown table and lightly scratched my finger on the surface. It was an anxious tendency of mine to mess with things when I was nervous. Usually I would tap pencils or click pens, but since neither of those items were available, I had to use my hands.

I continued to do this, focusing all of my attention away from my sister. The fact that my parents didn't want to see me definitely tore me apart. After all this time of being away from any type of love, I really wanted to see my mom and dad. Sure, I loved my sister, but I wanted a hug from my parents so much more.

"Listen, I'll talk to them and tell them that you really miss them." Alyssa interrupted my continuous thoughts. She reached out and placed her hands on mine, which were still fidgeting. "I really want them to come visit you with me next time."

I just nodded in response, not wanting to talk. What was there to say? Why couldn't she just leave me so I could go back to my loneliness?

Without thinking, I stood up and began walking out of the visitation room. I wanted nothing more than to be alone. What made my heart stop for a second, though, was the comment from Alyssa.

"I drove all this way just to see you because I missed you, and this is what you do to me. You're unbelievable, kid." She shouted after me. I could hear the amount of pain in her voice.