Joshler| She Left Me...

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Me rereading this after a dark day ^^^

Josh sat up in bed, attempting to rub the tired out of his eyes. He yawned, and stretched his arms out in front of him, popping his back. He rubbed his eyes once more before looking around. He took off his sweat pants and threw them in the hamper, along with his muted red shirt.

He heard the front door open and close, it was likely Brendon and Tyler. He brushed it off and opened his closet, then grabbed a towel. He opened his door and walked out, then up to the bathroom door. Tyler and Brendon sat in the kitchen across from the bathroom door.

"I'm going to take a shower." Tyler didn't make eye contact, his eyes... lay some where else on Josh. Brendon nodded and went back to his phone. Josh opened the door and walked into the bathroom, setting the soft blue towel down on the counter. He reached out and turned the nob to hot in the shower. The water came out, first cold then warm. He stripped of his boxers. He went to step into the shower, but the door creaked open slightly.

"Hey Josh, don't worry I'm not looking-" it was Tyler. Josh interpreted him.

"Not like you haven't seen it before." Josh scoffed quietly. Tyler sighed.

"I'm sorry for everything." Tyler looked up at him, down for a second, then up again. Josh didnt hide himself.

"Sorry that you don't accually love me, and that you'd sleep with my, now ex, best friend?" Josh frowned. "Sorry that nobody fucking wants me?" Josh turned his back and stepped into the shower before Tyler could see his tears.

"Josh that's not what I ment." Tyler stepped into the bathroom and closed the door behind him. "I ment I'm sorry that you have to put up with my bullshit." Tyler looked at the shower curtain. Nothing.

Josh sat down in the bottom of the shower, squeezing his eyes shut, trying to stop himself from crying.

"It's your own mentality, you know, how you think no one loves you." Tyler sat down on the toilet, lid down.
"Your mother loves you."

Josh's breath hitched. He tried saying something, but the lump in his throat made it impossible.

"Your sisters and brother love you too." Tyler said, sighing.

It was quiet for a moment.

"Not like that." Josh sobbed out. Tyler looked over at the shower curtain again, now aware of Josh's tears.   "Not like I want to be loved." Josh's breath hitched loudly once more.       "I want someone to grow old with threw thick and thin." Tyler felt his eyes water up.

"But I know it'll never happen. Because I'm only for 'using'. Its all anyone ever does. You did it too." Josh continued to choke out his feelings. Tyler felt a tear run down his cheek, off his chin. "No body will ever love me longer that a few moments." Josh sobbed loudly now, as he sat in the shower. "And even when they try to show love, to convince me that they love me, I end up hurting them!" Josh's nose began go bleed again. He didn't do anything to stop it.

"Josh it's not like that-" Tyler tried to sympathize as he wiped a tear from his face.

"Yes it fucking is!" Josh shouted, making Tyler flinch. "Nobodies ever going to really love me, stop saying anything else!" Josh's voice cracked. He held his hands to his neck and felt his bruise. "And you won't have even done shit if Drake choked me to death." Blood from his nose slipped into his mouth and down his chin, mixing with the water.

Tyler tore the curtain open. "If Drake would have kill you, I would have kill myself! So shut the fuck up Josh! I love you and I don't know how to show it, I'm fucking sorry!" Tyler screeched, his voice cracking as tears flooded from the sits that were his eyes. He closed the curtain quickly and walked out of the room.

Tyler walked down the short hallway into his room, slamming the door. Brendon flinched and looked up.
"Shit..." Brendon got up from the small wooden chair he sat in, walking over to Tyler's door. "Hey man you good?" He cracked open the door. Tyler sat, leaning against the bed with his face in his hands.

Um sorry to fuck with yo feelings...
Poor daddy dun.

Banana out

Btw my house caught fire whilst writing this. God has sensed my sins.

-trash banana |-/