Arranged

Chapter Thirty Five

09/01/2017

Kristin didn't exactly sleep as peacefully as the night before. Whatever the reason was-- though she secretly knew it was the two- story separation, and possibly the previous argument-- she fell victim to those same dreadful nightmares.

The worse thing about it was that she knew she was dreaming, yet she could never wake up. She was always stuck in her horrible dreams.

She was in a dark, cold room. She tried to look around her for something-- anything, but it was pitch black. Not the darkness you see when you turn off a light and you have to wait for your eyes to adjust, either. It was the darkest darkness she's ever been in, and it gave her a very uneasy feeling.

For some reason she knew someone was watching her. She could feel a pair of eyes on her, yet she didn't know where they were.

The feeling in itself terrified her and she heard herself hyperventilating.

That was another thing.

So far, she had had enough of these nightmares to figure out what always happened.

There was darkness, the feeling of being trapped with no escape. The feeling of something evil watching you but you can't see it. Then there was the dead bodies that would always haunt her.

She would feel the same things; tightness in her chest, making her struggle for breath. The overwhelming feeling of anxiously awaiting the evil thing that was secretly watching her. The paralyzingly feeling of fear once she knew it was coming for her. And then, of course, as if this wasn't bad enough, the most horrible feeling would hit her where she couldn't breathe.

No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't get the oxygen into her lungs. Instead she would start to hyperventilate, and struggle for breath, basically waiting to die, before she would wake herself up with either her screams, or her crying.

Damn, that's right.

Kristin didn't know how and why she was so affected by what she had gone through to give her the most unimaginable terrifying night terrors she'd get almost every night-- sometimes more.

Maybe it was actually her fault? Maybe she was bringing these unto herself as a coping mechanism to deal with her secret guilt. Or maybe she was designed differently, her chemical makeup out of control after witnessing death so close. Whatever the reason, she would torture herself with these questions, feeling responsible for her own nightmares.

And the worse thing was, no one really knew how she felt. What she would go through, what she would see in her nightmares, what she would hear.

That was what was going through Kristin's head every single night.

So when she was shaken awake she was gasping for air, tears streaming down her face.

Kristin immediately sat up, scooting towards the other side of the bed.

She was too afraid to look at Ryder, to see his reaction. Sure, he had seen a glimpse of her night terrors when she had briefly taken that nap in his office.

She knew this was one hundred times worse.

"Kristin, it's okay, you're awake now," she heard his voice beside her.