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lately it's been worse than usual. now, they've started making announcements whenever someone starts seeing Color. it's probably just another way for the lucky ones to celebrate and brag. as if they don't do it enough already, right? I know it's not true, but I feel like every name that's gleefully called out is a direct jab at me. me, the freak who can't seem to find it in himself to care about much, let alone fall in love.
now that I'm in my senior year of high school, my peers have found new ways to taunt me. they do that thing -- the awful, dreadful thing that makes you sick to your belly once you realize what's happening. they've taken a liking to sending their friends up to ask me out, wait for me to fall for it and inevitably say no, then snicker and turn up their noses with some variation of: "Looks like nothin' has changed since last year, eh?" or another good one they do happens during lunch where, once they see me passing by their table, they make obnoxious sounds while they gorge themselves on school food that's probably been made in a lab. "Oh, I just love today's lunch. Don't you just love this food, Aleks?" and then I do the usual shameful march off to god-knows-where, my face flushed and bile at my throat as they have a good laugh behind me.
I did see something I never thought I'd see. someone actually let me walk past them without any jeering. didn't get a good look at them, sadly. probably the only time I'd see them with a neutral face and not one of disgust. all they did was stare at me as I walked. they must be new and don't know who I am. don't worry, though; they'll know soon enough.
