Puppy fat- Dolan

F o u r t e e n

I hadn't slept yet.

Grayson's arms were wrapped around me protectively and I felt guilty that I couldn't sleep. It wasn't his fault though, it was my own. I'd been so proud of how far I'd come but the thought of the pretzel had sent my mind craving sugars once again. It was so strong that it physically hurt, yet I pushed it deeper down, determined to not let my old bad habits resurface.

As my mind focused on this, it also came across options to stop myself and only one solution seemed to have no flaws apart from the fact that I knew it was unhealthy, but I had to go through with it. It was the only way to get the sugar from my body.

Slowly, I peeled Grayson's arms from around me and carefully made my way to the bathroom, before kneeling in front of the toilet and repeating the actions that I had only done once before. Soon enough, the unhealthy snack I had eaten earlier came flooding out of my body and into the toilet. Although I should have been satisfied, unfortunately, I was not and again, forced more contents up.

I had anticipated to be quiet but it occurred to me that it wasn't the case when both twins ran into the bathroom, staring at me as a hot sweat began to prickle my skin.
"Are you okay Cass?"
I nodded slowly, avoiding eye contact, I couldn't let either of them find out what I had just done to myself, they'd be so mad or ashamed, or both...

Ethan came over, pulling me into a warm hug that I instantly relaxed into, seeking the comfort that he unknowingly radiated. It was that moment that I was just thankful that he had forgiven me and we were still best friends despite that I'd hurt him.

Grayson however, studied me until his face fell, "You did it again, didn't you?" Instantly my eyes brimmed with tears and raced down my cheeks as he sighed.
"Why would you do that? It's so stupid!" He growled, raising his voice that only made the tears fall faster, I knew he'd be mad...

"I-I.. I'm sorry!" I sobbed, my body jerking with each jagged breath I could manage and I heard Ethan sigh.
"Why Cass..?" He murmured, yet I didn't want to answer to them. They wouldn't understand, they've never been the size that I was, they'd think I was stupid.

Therefore, I didn't speak to them, I tore from Ethan's arms and sprinted as fast as I could down the stairs, yet I wasn't quick enough and Grayson grabbed my arm, trying to coax me into coming back upstairs with him. I wanted to, yet I also wanted to stick up for myself. I pulled my arm as hard as I could from his grasp, yet once I was free, I completely lost my balance, sending me to topple downstairs, my body creating a hard impact with the ground. Before I could do anything, my thoughts clouded over and my vision decreased to nothing.

***
I knew I wasn't really awake when I thought I was. I heard everything around me yet my eyes wouldn't open and I couldn't respond to anything going on.
Grayson was cursing and I'm fairly sure he was also crying due to his voice cracking at every profanity that tumbled from his lips.

Ethan tried his best to comfort him yet every so often he'd sit beside me and take my hand, begging me to wake up because I was breaking Grayson. I wish I could've just awoke, but of course, I couldn't.

"Cass... I'm sorry for getting mad... I love you... Please fight, don't leave me!" Grayson sobbed and my heart ached, yet try as I might, my body remained still.

My mother also entered the room, and the thought of this caused my stomach to churn in fear. I never knew what she could come out with. Since the twins were also here, I was hoping that she wouldn't say anything bad as she adored them, but there was a possibility that she'd forget to turn her filter on.

"Ethan darling, can you get me a glass of water?" She asked, as though she was royalty. If I'd have been able to, I would've rolled my eyes, but since I couldn't, I mentally did the action.
Ethan, being himself, obviously agreed and poured her a glass of water before handing it to her.

She must have taken a sip because a moment later, she spoke up, disgust lacing her words, "Ugh I hate hospital water. If Cassidy had just lost some weight then we wouldn't have been in this situation."

It was then that silence fell upon the room until Grayson exploded, "How dare you say that! Cass has lost a lot of weight recently even though she didn't need to lose it in the first place because she was pretty damn beautiful when I first laid eyes on her! The reason she fell down the stairs is because we tried to stop her from leaving after we caught her throwing up, trying to lose more weight!" He bellowed, and I wish I could've seen my mother after that because I'm sure she would've been trembling.

Or not.
"Well that's the problem then. She got rid of all the nutrients from her body making her feel dizzy. It's her own fault."

This time, Ethan spoke up, "You should hear yourself! Cass has done nothing wrong! Just leave."

My mother went to speak again yet quickly decided against it before I heard a chair scraping and the sound of high-heels clicking on the tiled floor. Finally the door shut and I heard the twins sigh in relief.

"I still love her Gray..." Ethan whispered, gently stroking the hair from my face.
"I wish I didn't so you don't feel bad but I do and I can't help it. She's been in my life for so long and the feelings have grew every moment I've spent with her."

"I know... I'm sorry... I honestly don't know why she chose me but I'll make sure I look after her..." Grayson said quietly, taking my hand gently and kissing it.

If only they knew that I could hear everything...

***
End of chapter!
Ahh dramatic chapter!!
Do you ship Cass with Ethan or Grayson??
Please vote and comment as it would mean the world!
-Ky 💜