Puppy fat- Dolan

T e n

"I love you." Ethan smiled, before kissing me softly again. I smiled against his lips, returning the kiss yet feeling my stomach churn in guilt as I did so. It was two days later and I still hadn't gathered the courage to tell him, and each moment I just felt worse and worse. Why me? Why did I have to fall for both twins?

"Okay love birds, split it up. Gym time." Grayson said quietly and I saw the sadness in his eyes. He came into my room every night whether I was at their house or my own, urging me to tell Ethan and each time when I told him I couldn't, he looked defeated and it hurt to see him like that.

I nodded, avoiding eye contact before pushing myself off of the sofa and jogging upstairs to change. Slightly breathless, I went into the guest room and pulled on some gym clothes that were hung up in the wardrobe. Pulling my hair into a ponytail, I looked in the mirror and sighed. I had changed, I had lost weight. Yet for me, this wasn't enough. My stomach still protruded and my thighs were still stuck together, no admired gap in sight. It was hard work.

I slowly made my way downstairs, blinking rapidly to ensure that the threatening tears wouldn't fall. It was embarrassing to cry over something so small and petty, I didn't want to make a fool of myself.
"You ready?" Gray asked, searching my eyes as though looking for something, but, before he could, I dropped my eyes to the ground and nodded.
"Yeah..."

The car ride was awkwardly silent and for Ethan, this was strange for he wasn't part of the two that knew why this silence was occurring. Thankfully, the journey was quick and I could escape as soon as we arrived, reuniting with the familiar machine of the treadmill.

I quickly set it to slightly higher than usual and began the tiresome routine that was now becoming a burden rather than an excitement. This was mostly due to the slowly developing results and I therefore knew it was working and had to endure it to finally achieve the figure that I longed for.

I could tell both twins were watching and although Ethan was oblivious to this, he was in competition with his twin brother, and he had already lost. After 30 minutes, I stepped off and went over to the weights. These were newer territory and as I grabbed a random one, I toppled slightly, quickly regaining balance once I had adjusted.

I started by squatting, wanting the booty that all the guys were interested in nowadays. As I was doing them, I soon felt two hands on my waist from behind, my head quickly whipping round to face Grayson, who's eyes hooded over slightly as our eyes connected.
"You look so much better when you're working out..." He mumbled, leaning slightly closer as I pulled away.
"Ethan's here..." I murmured, as I glanced over at my boyfriend who was lost in thought as he used the rowing machine.
"I know, and this is totally innocent, I'm helping you as you workout, correcting your technique," Grayson told me as I nodded- right.

Although Grayson said it was innocent, he still removed his hand when Ethan turned his head slightly even if it wasn't enough to see us.
"Cass... I'm getting impatient..." He whispered, nuzzling his head into my neck, causing my heart to race rapidly, the butterflies in my stomach fighting to flutter the most.

"What's this?" He suddenly asked, pulling away and staring rather angrily at my neck as it suddenly dawned on me- a hickey. Ethan had begun kissing my neck the other day and I felt him began to try and give me a hickey. I couldn't stop him since he officially is my boyfriend, yet I knew Grayson would be upset once he saw. I was correct.

I just shrugged, not really caring to explain to Grayson what I had just thought. He shook his head angrily, stalking away to the punch bag where he released his anger. It was hot.

After another 30 minutes, the three of us were ready to return home.
"Cass... Are you stopping at ours tonight?" Ethan asked, as we began to drive.
"If it's okay with you two..." I replied, smiling slightly as both twins nodded quickly.

Once we got in, Ethan was already halfway up the stairs. "I'm gonna shower!" He shouted, leaving Grayson and I alone.
"Cass. I can't help myself now, I need to do this..." He whispered, crashing his lips to mine, yet I quickly pulled away.
"We need to wait until I've told Ethan..." I said quietly, feeling awful that I still hadn't told him.
"Cass. You want to do this. You know you do. That's what this is all about. Just go along with it and if we get caught then Ethan will connect the dots. Just let yourself loose with me..." Grayson whispered, pressing his lips to mine once again.

This time however, I returned the actions, wrapping my still chunky arms around his neck and pressing myself closer to him. He made me feel as though I was beautiful, as though I wasn't the body that I saw in my reflection.

Only pulling away once I was desperate for air, I gazed up at him, biting my lip nervously. He returned the smile and rested his forehead against mine, kissing my cheek.

"I love you..." I whispered, not regretting a single word. It was the truth, I may not have wanted to express it but I couldn't not say it for any longer and the look on Grayson's face made it all the more worth while.

My words also made one thing even more obvious- I had to tell Ethan!

That was something I wasn't happy with...

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- Ky 💜