You've been quiet lately (Prinxiety)

Anxiety

*Trigger warning: Cutting

+A Lil dear evan hansen because why not~

I lay in bed as I sigh,
Looking over at the razor stained with my blood.
Do I regret it?
Why..?
Anxiety
Too much,
I close my eyes and think
'Don't let them see'
'The mess that you are.'
'Cause what if everyone saw?'
'What if everyone knew?'
'Would they like what they saw..?
Or would they hate it too..?' (DEHHHH)
I switch off from what I was thinking originally words fail from dear evan hansen, because I can relate.
and think about what people say what I say. Things I regret mostly.
Honestly, that's all I'm good for. Panicking,
Well, Not even good for.

"I wonder what your friends are thinking about you now"
"What if he.. no of course not.
Why.. would.. stop!
No. No...
No no no.. no...
Is that all you are good for?
Panicking
That's all you are good for.
That's why everyone hates you
And you know that.

It kept repeating. Over and over in my head.

Yes I know I seem that I don't care
I seem like I don't mind
I just brush it off
Until later,
You know I have feelings too.
On the inside it's killing me.

"Someday. Your going to stop trying,"
" someday You are going to end it all..."
"Somday...."
I can see why people don't like me.

I have made people feel bad about them self

Whenever I appear someone screams, sighs shows that they don't want me here.

I grab a razor head to the bathroom.. sit down. And start cutting on my arm

Cut
Cut
Cut
Cut.

they get deeper

More blood spills out.
Dripping onto the floor.

My mind echos
"Useless"
"Meaningless"
"Nobody wants you here"
"Why don't you just die?"
"Nobody likes you"

With every negative thought

The voices in my head get louder,
I can't stop them
They won't stop

The next moring

I look around I haven't slept at all
I walk into the kitchen before anyone wakes up, look at all the food

"Don't eat"
"You don't deserve it"

I walk into my room. Cut some more.

23
24
25
26.
1
2
3..

It's funny the voices in my head sound like logan, patton, roman, even thomas.

I start crying. Crying for.. around 10 minutes.
My body it aches..
From anxiety attacks. The cuts on my arm and legs.

I
Don't
Know
What
To
Do.

It's been a week since I appeared in thomas's video,

They are probably happy without me.

((Sorry it's kinda short I'm new to this.
And HAH idk how to write