; eleven

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warning, pretty heavy/serious chapter.

I think its been seven days since I last saw Chloe.
I haven't really been keeping track, nothing matters anymore.
Time is just an illusion, it doesn't exist.

I've resorted to temporarily soothing my pain at the expense of my liver, being drunk makes you forget about everything. No Chloe, no school, no problems.

It was about 5:00 by now, nobody home but me. I was wrapped up in my bed, staring at the dark blue paint clad my walls. I sighed, shoved my blankets aside, and drowsily sat up. She was on my mind again, but that was nothing new. I stuck my arm under my bed and drug it around until I felt the outline of a bottle handle. I pulled it out, satisfied I still had about half a bottle of Jack Daniels left. I spun the cap off, the stench of alcohol instantly filling my nose. I coughed, and gave a other sigh.

I lifted the bottle to my face, as I have done many times before, and began to chug away at the remainder of the bottle. Tears began to roll down my face as the poisonous liquid slithered down my throat like a snake ready to destroy my insides.

Before I even knew it, the bottle was empty. I sat it next to me and closed my eyes, and I began to get drowsier them I typically do when I drink. I blinked, everything spinning and getting blurry. I tried to stand up, but kept tumbling back onto my shaking knees. I willingly closed my eyes, fell backward, and let unconsciousness hit me like a wave.

Hopefully, just hopefully, it was enough to kill me.

Chloe, her pain was spiking in my heart.
The death of Chloe's mother.
Those kids at school who made fun of me.
I wasn't with any 'posse'.
My grades are down the toilet.
My life is not worth it, any of it.

I know I'm just being selfish, but I obviously failed at helping Chloe. I'm not helping Chloe, so now I'm going to help myself. I'm sick and tired of taking care of everybody but myself.

This world is just not my place.

~~

"Maddie!" I called upstairs. "You did none of your chores! This laundry won't fold itself!"

There was no response.

I noisily sighed and called her name again. Why was Maddie so stubborn? I know she was mourning her hurt friend, but lounging around in her room does nothing to help Chloe or herself.

"Mackenzie, go get your sister." I grouched at my youngest, who was watching TV on the couch.

Mackenzie cleared her throat and shouted "Maddie! Get downstairs!" From the couch. I crossed my arms and raised an eyebrow. "Kenz, I could've done that on my own." I said. She shrugged. "But you didn't."

I realised this was going nowhere, so I headed up the old white carpeted stairs myself. I knocked on Maddie's bedroom door and tugged at the locked door handle. Maddie's room was lifeless, and I began to get a little nervous. I went down to the appliance drawer and got a small flathead Phillip's screwdriver. I went back up to Maddie's room, stuck the head of the screw driver in the lock, and twisted it until I heard the lock pop open. I opened Maddie's door, and began to scream.

"MACKENZIE, CALL 911!" I screamed. Mackenzie peeked curiously up the steps, realised I was serious, and dashed for the phone.

The daughter I had given birth to, that I raised, just lying there. My heart just stopped, I feel next to her, and wrapped her body next to mine. "Hold on." I whispered.

A/N-
S

orry I just hit you with a sad chapter, I wasn't feeling writing a happy chapter today lol.

Enjoy dudes,
Hanna

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