A decade after. ( Ryden )

You're here?

" It's been too long! " 

Brendon's face turned red as he slowly turned around.  He had heard that voice shout his name three times before he could not avoid it anymore.  At least... not without regretting ignoring it for the rest of his life. He'd probably write a few dozen songs just about ignoring it. he didn't want to break down while singing them like he had in Casual Affair because of the memories that had come back to him during it. 

  " Ryan! " 

 Brendon could barely say it without tears streaming down his cheeks and his voice cracking.  " So.. " 

Ryan spoke softly, just the way Brendon remembered it. 

" Funny seeing you here. " 

How was Brendon suppose to know who Adam Levine invited to this party? There were hundreds of people here. 

" Yeah! " Brendon responded, trying to remain looking happy even though he was breaking down/screaming on the inside.  

Did Ryan really not remember what he had done to Brendon in Capetown? Did he really forget the tears that filled his face as he was petrified with sadness?  No. Ryan remembered. He always had such a great memory. 

 Ryan kicked the ground with the toe of his shoe.  

" So how are you? "  He said shyly, breaking the silence. Brendon cleared his throat.  " Um, fine I guess. " He awkwardly added the last part: 

" You? "

" Oh, I'm... fine too. " 

Brendon's head was spiralling.  They use to be so close and now it seemed so strange and new to just talk to him! There was tension. Definitely. That was as obvious as anything. But Brendon wasn't going to lie, he had missed Ryan. A lot. All he wanted to do was lay down and cry. I know... super manly... Brendon didn't mind being sensitive. It wasn't a bad feature to have. It just meant he was fluent in emotions. Which helped with song writing.  This was bringing back decade old feelings though, and Brendon didn't like it. His whole life he was telling himself if he ever saw Ryan again... if he ever got that opportunity... he was going to pour his heart out. It didn't have to change anything. No. But he would feel so much better with it off his chest. Knowing that Ryan was aware, at least, of his feelings would mean a lot. But now that it was real... now that this was actually happening... he was standing right in front of him, he was nervous. Which he should not have been, considering he has been preparing himself mentally for a decade. Nevertheless he was. Still... like he was telling himself, he would never get this shot again. He decided to go for it.

 " Ryan, listen; "

Here is goes...

Brendon took a deep breath.

" Ryan I- "

' C'mon, Brendon, this was your chance! '

Is what he was telling himself.  

' Stop stalling! '

" I've missed you. "

' Good... ease into it... '

" I've really missed you. I'm sorry to bombard you with this. Really.. I am.. but I... well, you know. "

Ryan nodded. 

 Brendon was scared he was going to hate him after this. He thought he totally screwed this up. His one shot, probably, ever. And he messed it up. That was the one thing he was good at.  At least, he implied that to himself constantly. People around him didn't seem to notice, more less mind it.

" I understand, Bren. " 

 Ryan ran a hand through his hair. Brendon missed watching him do that.  It was one of Ryan's cute, little quirks. Brendon thought.  

 " I'm really sorry we ended things on the terms we did. I really don't want you to think I hate you. Cause I don't. "