$20 For You {D.H. & P.L.}

Confessions

   Dan

    Okay, maybe leaving Phil on the balcony was a bit harsh. I'm supposed to make him love me, not hate me. I mean, I am rude to most, so I think I've done better then usual? Putting my cigarettes up, I make my way quietly to my room. Grabbing a pair of sweatpants, I change quickly so I'm in my usual pajamas. Lightly tracing the tattoo across my stomach, I get a slight sense of nostalgia from it. Remembering why I got it as I trace the words, Failure is not an option. In its black calligraphy-styled ink. Remembering that Phil is over, I grab a hoodie and joggers to give to him. Feeling slightly bad because I literally have nothing of color in my wardrobe.

       He looks up at me as I walk into the kitchen, passing him the clothes. "Here wear these to sleep. You can change in the bathroom or my room is over there." I point to the door I came out of, while passing him the clothes. His usual pale cheeks, have a slight tint of pink to them, as he looks at me, and for once very quiet. He grabs the clothes hastily and quickly walks to the bathroom. 8:00pm. The clock reads, making me grateful that I don't have work till tomorrow. This is the part where I flop backwards onto the couch and spend most of my night on my laptop. Figuring I have Phil staying, I should try to be somewhat social. How do I do that. I literally have had nobody over here before, not even Chris, I don't know what to do.

Feeling slightly awkward, I dig through the cupboards trying to find the microwave popcorn. Finding it, I take the wrapping off, and stick it in the microwave. It's kinda funny, cause the repetitive pop! Noise is actually kinda cool. I hear the bathroom door open, and see Phil walking out awkwardly. My clothes don't fit on his small frame, as they hang loosely from his stick figure. His fringe doesn't even exist anymore, as he has it pushed back. The black does go good on him, but I do prefer his pastel look on him. "Popcorn and a movie. Let's be stereotypical!" I joke, attempting to lighten the mood. I'm failing miserably please don't remind me. He rolls his eyes, a slight curl to his pale lips, as he shakes his head. "What are we watching?" He asks, his voice a slightly higher tone, as I put the popcorn into the bowl. "I don't know, any preferences?" I shrug, going into the fridge. "No horror movies. Under any circumstances." He gets serious, and glares directly at me, with a look that could probably kill.

Worst mistake he's ever made.

    *time skip just cause*

Being halfway through the movie, Phil is finally being slightly more relaxed around me. He's not as tense, and he doesn't move to the other end of the couch. A sudden weight on my shoulder, manages to scare the living shit outta me for a second, before I realize it's Phil. He's fallen asleep. Great.

   I don't notice the way is heart flutters softly against me.

   I also don't notice is slow, but soft breathing against my neck.

I completely ignore the way he softly buries his forehead into my collarbone.

Completely ignoring, yep totally.

   His small fingers brush gently against my stomach as they curl around my waist. I'd be lying too you if I told you I knew exactly what too do. Most people would probably move him, but I really don't want too. Honestly he needs it, considering the way he is snuggled against me, the last time he was held was way to long ago. I grab the blanket I was too lazy to use, and put it over the both of us. His wrist is slightly exposed, showing scars that are obviously from self harm. The little white lines, go in short rows for the exposed two inches of his wrist. I feel a pang of guilt really, when he figures out about the bet. I don't want him to find out.

   From the looks of things he's already been hurt before, and I don't wanna be the asshole that hurts him again. Considering my personality is literally an asshole, I don't know how well I can keep that. It doesn't take a genius to know someone close to him has hurt him before, emotionally and physically. Just because of this stupid, fucking bet, but hey. As long as I don't fall in love, I'm good.

    Right?