A Friendships Love - Settler series book 1 (Wattpad version, first draft)

You're Free

You’re Free

“Payton! I turned from my chair at the dresser, to see Ashley poking her head in through a small space, she had made in the door.

“Morning Ashley, come in.” I said, whilst turning back around to push the last pin into my hair. I heard Ashley move into the room. She sat down on the bed and waited till I was done, and facing her before she spoke to me.

“Did you sleep well, last night Payton?”

"As well asi could." I replied. Gracey came over from where she was sitting on the bed also, and climbed onto Ashley’s lap.

“Hey sweetie how did you sleep? You know you don’t have to be scared to stay here don’t you?” I watched as Ashley smoothed away, the stray curls of Gracey's hair, and Gracey nodded her head. “Do you think you can find your way down to the kitchen for a muffin? Judith makes them, just as fluffy as our old cook in England, which means they are moist and sweet also. Would you like one?” Again Gracey nodded. “Payton, and I will be down shortly ok.” I kept watching as Gracey hopped off Ashley’s lap and slipped out of the door.

“I’m assuming that you have something to say to me, that isn’t for children’s ears.” I said to Ashley  as, she gave her attention back to me.

“Yes I do Payton.” I watched as Ashley played with the edge of a pillow that she pulled onto her lap. “I just want to tell you how hard it’s been to love someone, who doesn’t love you back.” I blinked; this conversation could go a few different ways, so I waited for her to continue. “I’m forever trying to figure out what Nash is thinking, I may not have a sizable dowry for someone of my standing, but even a man with nothing but land should at least want me for what little comes with me.” She looked up to me with sadness in her eyes. Something had clearly happened last night that I missed, while I was putting Gracey down.

“What is it, that you’re trying to say?”

“Nash, and I had a talk last night Payt. Well I should say I talked, and he listened.” I saw the tears well in her eyes.

“Oh Ash what did he say.” Ash started shaking her head.

“No Payt, it’s not in what he says, but what he doesn’t say. He doesn’t have to tell me, he thinks I wouldn’t be able to handle the life of a normal settler, without cooks, and stable boys. He doesn’t understand that we don’t have these people working for us because were pampered pompous's, we employ them because they would have  nowhere else to go.”

“Ash, I think he knows that.”

“So he knows all these things about us yet he holds back. He sees that im trying. And I haven’t kept my feelings, necessarily a secret, yet I don’t think I’ve fawned over him to make him so confident, that he can make me wait.”  I sat there and watched as my normally cheerful, well put together friend fall apart in front of me. I vowed to myself to ask Nash to make his feelings for this women known. Either way, its better than not knowing. I thought to Will. I’ve been doing the same thing to him really; at least Charlie had the benefit to know where he stood, in a round about way. Will continued to be in the dark, even when I know how he feels.

“Ashley what can I do?”

“Payton just promise me one thing, and that will be all that I ask you to do for me.” My heart stilled, in fear of what Ash would ask of me. Would Ash ask me to marry her brother, to save him the heart ache she feels. I stared at her. A true friend should say, ‘yes ill do anything just say the word’. But I didn’t I sat there thinking of myself, when my friend clearly needed me to say something. A friend who has been there for me, without asking anything from me before.