Deceptions & Secrets

Chapter 19: Capture the Flag

Chapter 19: Capture the Flag

Date: Dauntless Initiation - Phase 1 / Baby Natty is 5 months old

** Tris POV **

Edward shoots me a grin as I keep pace next to him during our warm up laps. I haven't held back in training since that morning with the knives; what would be the point? Everyone saw what I was capable of, so there is no point in pretending. Now that I keep pace with Edward instead of hanging back with Will and Christina, he and I pair off for training often. Myra gives me a friendly smile as we lap her near the end of our warm-up, and I can tell she doesn't worry about me training so closely with Edward. Outside of training, we still don't interact much more than simply sitting at the same table for meals, but I always notice what a happy couple Edward and Myra are. It must be so nice to have a steady boyfriend to trust.

As usual, we finish our laps first. I move near the wall opposite the water fountain and begin stretching alongside Lynn, Marlene and Uriah. We train separately from the Dauntless-born, but often are near each other during warm-ups, especially now that Four and Lauren have been... whatever they are. I don't know if they're just hooking up or actually dating, and I don't care. At least that's what I tell myself. If I repeat it to myself often enough, maybe it will eventually be true.

Four is a few yards away with his clipboard, but I don't look at him. I have made a point lately to pretend he isn't even there, other than moments where I absolutely must acknowledge his existence due to his position as my instructor. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Lauren approach him with a bag in her hand.

"You left a few things when you cleared out earlier," she says to him. Cleared out? My ears perk at this. You don't care, Tris. It doesn't matter. You don't care what he does, or who he does. Nope. Don't care, don't care, don't care...

Four looks in the bag. "Thanks. Sorry about that-- I thought I had everything." Is he not going back there? He sets the bag against the wall, and then seems to be distracted by Peter and Edward having some sort of staredown across the room, and, setting his clipboard on a nearby table, walks away to address it.

"Why is he taking all his stuff back?" Marlene asks. I know Lauren is a lot more easygoing with her initiates than Four is with us, but it still surprises me to hear my friends asking her personal questions. "You're not already breaking up, are you?"

"We were never really an exclusive couple in the first place," Lauren shrugs. She's smiling; I guess this really meant nothing to her. To either of them. Somehow it is still hard to wrap my head around Four having meaningless sex. I don't know how to reconcile him to that boy I was so in love with, the one I thought I knew so well. I need to stop looking for glimpses of Tobias. He is Four now. "We had a really good time for a while, but we're better as friends." Four has returned from breaking up the initiates' little argument, and leans against the table he had set his clipboard on.

For practically the first time all week, I glance at Four. His dark blue eyes stare into mine and hold my gaze; his eyebrows are furrowed, but he doesn't look angry. Then Lauren says something to him and he looks away from me, smiling and looking relaxed as he answers her. Flustered, I walk away without a word, heading to the water fountain for a drink.

I am still feeling really hurt by Four-- the way he treated me the day of his choosing ceremony, and how he has behaved toward me pretty much the entire time I have been in Dauntless, and most of all, for leaving Mother and me alone with Marcus. But, at the same time, I know deep down, I also am so relieved that he and Lauren are over. I still haven't quite decided how I feel about Four, or what I want. Not that it matters. He made himself very clear that he was done with me two years ago.