Never Look Back

Chapter four

"A smile can hide a thousand tears." Saher Farhan

When I went to school the next day, Caleb pulled me aside. He was worried. I assured him that my father didn't do anything severe to me, and that was the end of it. I wish I could just get away from this world and go to a better one, but we can't always get what we want. I went to visit Leo after school. The doctors said that he was doing well and might wake up soon. I hoped he did; I needed him more than ever now. I walked home slowly. I knew I was supposed to go straight to the house when school let out, but I needed to check on Leo. I walked in and put my stuff down.

"Oh, hello! Is that really what you wore today? Sweetie, you can try to be pretty your whole life, but when it comes down to it, either you're pretty or you aren't. You, obviously aren't," Melissa said. I looked down at the ground. I knew I was ugly, but it hurts more when other people see it. "Anyway, John is on another trip and will be gone for about a week. Get to cleaning. I have guest coming over in an hour," she sneered as she walked away. I changed and then cleaned the whole downstairs. I had just begun cooking dinner when the guest arrived. I looked at the knife in my hands. It'd be so easy to escape; two quick little cuts and I'd be gone. The pain would end and I would no longer be a nuisance. I was a waste of space and air on the earth, and this would help everyone. I pushed these thoughts back. I know they are wrong, but they are also correct. As I finished, Melissa walked into the kitchen.

"You are done. I will serve the food. Nobody can know that you are here, so you won't be sleeping in here tonight. Sneak out the back. If someone by chance does see you, you're the family chef. Have fun sleeping in the streets," she laughed as she grabbed some plates. I walked out the back door. I couldn't stay over at Caleb's, he said his parents were home. I didn't know where anyone else lived and I was stupid enough to have forgotten my phone. I sighed. This was going to be a long night. I walked around aimlessly, letting my feet choose my destination. Eventually, I looked away from the ground. I was in what looked to be the slums. I walked quickly and kept my head down at first, but then I decided I might as well look around. I needed to get out of this area. I found two people standing in an alleyway. I would ask them for directions. I walked up to them and they both turned towards me. They were both wearing ripped jeans and black hoodies. The one had his hood up, and the one who didn't- wholly cow! He was lean and muscular, his skin was a gorgeous carmel tan, he had black hair that was slightly spiked in the front, and warm, coffee brown eyes. He had a natural smirk on his face like he knew he could get whatever he wanted. He looked like something an angel would've carved. He was leaning against the wall. The one with the hood up came closer to me. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a bag.

"Here's some of the good stuff," he said as he swiped his finger across his nose; the international symbol for drugs. "Fifty bucks a bag, this is the best we've got," he said.

"Uh I-I," I struggled to speak. The man against the wall walked over. I could feel him studying me.

"What's your name?" he asked. I shouldn't actually tell him my name, but I had to tell him something. I didn't want him to hurt me.

"Sanchez."

"Ah, only giving me your last name, I see. I'm Valentino then," he said. He took the bag from his friend and tossed it at me. There were a few white pills in it.

"Here, it's free this time," he said. I looked at it. I shouldn't take these, but wasn't I saying earlier that I'd like to escape reality? I put them in my pocket. Just in case.

"Uh thanks. I'm kinda lost and need to get back to town, can you tell me where to go?"

"Three blocks up, there's a coffee shop. Turn right and you'll be downtown," Valentino said. I thanked him and walked away. The drugs were like a weight in my pocket; they were heavy and my hand was itching to touch them. I ignored my impulses. I wasn't even halfway there when a creep approached me. He whistled.