The Cutthroat's Lament [Killing Stalking X Reader]

= 11 = One More Time

=== Disclaimer: all. characters b elong to koo.gi (except Oh Jamie / Jamie Oh) The character Oh Jamie belongs to Ahyun ===

M/A - MATURED AUDIENCES ONLY -

Your P.O.V

"Please...Let me live.."

I clawed at the light emitting from the top of the water. Bubbles of air escaped my throat. Life was drifting away from my eyes, it was not alarming no more... I let my arms sway to the side.

"(Y/N)!" Arms gripped my back, pulling me futher below into the deep water. Suddenly, i sat down below, at the end, everything paused again.

=============================================

"WHAH!" i flopped up, i was back home?.. I checked my body, and..I was naked.. in the bathroom..

After I showered, i quickly made my way out. This scene, so familiar... moving around my home I walk into the kitchen, no shit.. Seungbae was there like I recalled before, he was cooking. "Morning, here's the french toast, lets go!!" He packed the food he cooked and scooted me with my bag to his car.

Due to the rain, we ran to his car, laughing all the way. Same as what I remembered, we went to patrol the other neighborhoods, and so we did. Paper work scattered on the passenger seat, coffee cups on the cup holders, this is what I wanted.

While approaching the last one, fuck.. wasn't Yoonbum there?... "Seungbae.. lets go to work now, Officer Seihi is in charge of the last neighborhood.." in response, he obeyed and drove away from the place... where the lost was found, and won't be ever again..

================= TIME SKIP =================

I sat in my office, in thought of what was going on.. it was obvious, I came back in time?.. I restarted?.. however to human knowledge, that was impossible for realistic situations. There on forth, I contemplated my existence as a "human" that when back in time..

The Tv! "I SHOULD'VE LET YOU DIE WHEN YOU COMMITED SUICIDE!" how did it know?... whenever I tried to kill myself, I keep coming back...

● ● ● FLASHBACK ● ● ●

Gradeschool [GRADE 5] May. 08, 2004

I watered Ms.Song's flowers on her table, that resided in my classroom. I tugged my sleeves down to cover my bruises, I continued watering until my hand slipped the empty container on the polished floor. Footsteps scurried to me, pushing me around, calling me clumsy. So bluntly, all I did was look out the window.. The sky was so pretty with pastel colors.

I walked slowly, my hand outstretched to the clouds, as the other hand supported me on the window. My slippery hands from the water caused me to slip from the window sill to down below. With a splash, I landed on the fish pond at the side of the school.

There, I nearly drowned myself with a head injury.. I was happy I nearly died, they even told me when they retrived me from the water, I was smiling with flower petals that stuck onto my bloodied head.

Highschool [GRADE 11] Sept. 19, 2010

It was raining, the campus was soon to be left empty. I made my way up the roof. Walking to the edge, the pliers I brought was tucked on my hand. Bending the fence metal, I was crying... The moment I was able to cut a hole big enough for me to pass in, I jumped off the building immediately. I thought I was free... however.. God had other plans

I survived, minor fractures and blisters.. a tent from below was able to cushion a part of my fall.. the media took it as news. They all saw it as if a tragedy happened, a schoolgirl pushed off a building... I started to hate the media by then..

College [Sophomore] January. 27, 2013

I was drinking a ton at the bar, Kisogi Bar. Another swing of shots, I walked home.. alone. Singing and swinging my arms around, I was alive.

No one was watching, I sat on a bench and looked at the speeding cars passing by. An idea came to my mind.. this is my chance to kill myself!

*Ring Ring* who the fuck is calling me

"(Y/n), its Seungbae, im going to pick you up.."

"heyyy, shuuut uppppp!!" Im so drunk..

"(Y/n), you retarted shit. Where are you?"

"Just wait...for *hic* a fuc- *hic* -king minute"

I wobbled to the street, I left my phone on the bench. A car was beeping, it happened so fast..

My body collided onto the car's front. I broke its windshield, pressing my back further to slip inside. I rolled my eyes, a horrified man stared at me.

"What? Never seen a person bleeding?"

I checked his ID... he smelled like the gay bar..

"Ah..you gay bitch *hic* you better sto- *hic* -ppp banging men's assholes!"

I vomited blood, happy in thought that my final moments were ranting to a gay guy banging gays..

● ● ● END OF FLASHBACK ● ● ●

what the fuck was I doing. No. Now I know what the hell Im going to fucking do.

I grabbed my car keys, banged my door shut. Walking through the hallways, I avoided every CCTV, offices of close friends and the work station of Seungabae.

Entering my car, makeup was scattered. I took some tattered clothing to wipe the mess off the passesnger seat.

Something glinted on the mirror. I scavanged at the back, moving things.. I saw that same knife. The rusty one.. I came back in time though.. are these things supposed to stay with me?... with no time to waste, I placed it on the passenger seat. The engine roared to life. I drove my way, into narrow roads leading to my parent's home.

Damm. It feels good to fuck everything and go wherever I want. For all the memories I've tried to kill myself, I ain't ever going to be like that gay guy.. fearing for his life and insecurites.. Im here, always near to death and yet this motherfucking world won't let me die. Fine then, I'll just kill other people who made me crave the feeling to die everyday.

"All i need to do, Is to live everything planned out avoid. Kill. Escape. Kill. Everything wih accuracy, accuracy, accuracy. All of that, One More Time."

===== END OF CHAPTER 11: ONE MORE TIME =====

Hi, late upload. You know.. while making this chapter, Wattpad almost deleted it. For shit. Bjt iz all gud, peace out bruh.
-Mik Mik