Soul Speaker

Chapter 6

There's a moment of silence as the track ends before starting back up again. You've had the same song, the one he sent in his first snap, Sigur Ros - Untitled 1, on repeat for hours now. The music just washes over you and touches your soul, allowing you to wallow in your feelings. You miss him. You miss him so much. You have a constant ache in your heart that no matter what you do, you cannot fill or ignore.

You have taken to just spending your days locked away in your room. You've given up trying to distract yourself with various things. Concentration is not a luxury you are afforded now. Your favorite tv shows go ignored, you can't remember the plot anyway. You frequently zone out from conversations, and your roommate has to repeat himself on several occasions. Sometimes you get out of bed. Sometimes you actually shower. Sometimes you remember to eat.

You lie there, staring at nothing and completely indifferent to the fact that the sun has started its descent into the hills. It's beginning to be a less than an appropriate level of dark in your room. It doesn't matter. Nothing matters.

You would roll over and just sleep, but your dreams are filled with images of him. His bright hair. His dark, chocolate eyes that squint when he laughs. His perfect, rounded teeth. His tight hugs. His warmth. You are surrounded by everything JoshJoshJosh, and it just makes you ache even more, waking up to a wet pillow, endless sorrow, and the feeling of being punched in the gut.

The sudden light on the display of your phone is incredibly bright on your eyes, stinging them and causing you to squint. You quickly shield your eyes, grimacing at the phone as if it has somehow insulted you. It takes several seconds before you realize that it's actually ringing.

Your stomach bottoms out. It's Josh.

"Hello?" you say, trying to clear your throat and sound normal.

"God, it's so good to hear your voice," he sighs into the phone.

Your heart leaps. You can feel it beating rapidly behind your chest and your stomach gives another flip. Your soul recognizes that voice and is trying desperately to reach it. It yearns and will do anything to be close to it again.

"I know, it's good to hear you too." You take a breath and drop your voice to a whisper, "I've missed you so much, Josh."

"That's... that's actually why I'm calling. Umm, we have a small break, an-and I was wondering if you'd be able to come out and visit me?"

"Visit you? You mean, like, out in LA? When? For how long?"

"Yeah. Well, today was our first day of break, actually, and we have about 5 more days." You hear him shuffle around as he switches the phone to his other ear. "I just... I'd really like to see you, and I..."

All at once it's like the dense smog around you has been lifted and you can suddenly breathe better. You feel lighter somehow. "Dude, yes! I can totally do that! Hang on, let me look up some info on plane tickets," you say quickly, swinging your legs to the side of your bed to go fetch your laptop.

"Well, I, umm... actually, can you be at the airport in an hour? I sort of already bought you a ticket." The line is silent as he waits for your reply. You can tell that he's probably holding his breath, half of his bottom lip pulled under his teeth.

You start sputtering before you can finally spit out, "WHAT?! JOSH! How did... how did you know I was even going to say yes? Or that I was going to let you buy my ticket?"

"I, umm, I didn't. I kind of just had it all pulled up and ready to go on my laptop. Then I called to see if you would be able to make it, and as soon as you agreed, I-I sort of... bought the ticket." You can hear the smirk in his voice.