Pain || Calum Hood

8: You Needed Help

Calum:

I kicked out all the guys from my room and immediately brought alexis in. I brought all my attention to her.

“What’s wrong? What’s going on? “

“I was so frustrated and I didn’t know what to do calum. It was instinct to somehow harm myself”

She was sitting there bawling her eyes out and I didn’t know what to do. She was in so much pain I could just tell by the way she spoke.

“How’d you harm yourself? We have to tell someone.”

“No! We can’t! This is why I came to you.”

“Just tell me what you did so I can help you then.”

“The doctor told my parents how they had to take my bandage off soon and I was really scared I didn’t want him to. He tried to look at the scar but I refused to let him. He made my parents leave because I was ‘behaving bad’ “

She paused for a while crying from the pain from her bloody arm. I cupped her cheek and brought her into eye contact.

“Everything’s going to be okay I promise, alright?”

She pushed my hand away and got off my bed.

“No, nothing’s going to be okay Calum. Nothing at all.”

“Why is your arm bleeding so bad, what did you do?”

“I took the bandage off myself and it wasn’t really healed at all. I was just, just so I don’t know. I just really needed that awful feeling again. I took off the bandage and banged my wrist off my desk so many times. The stitches were starting the come out and there was blood everywhere.”

I brought her close to me and hugged her tight.

“Everything’s going to be okay, stop worrying.”

She pushed me away, and starting crying even more than she was before. I was so confused and didn’t know why she was so scared of what was going to happen.

“Do you not get it? Their gonna see that I’m capable of hurting myself again, and their gonna bring me somewhere else so that I can’t do it again. Calum I don’t want to leave. I don’t want to leave you.”

“Don’t worry about me, I’m going to be fine. You really need to get that healed lex. I really want you to stay but I just want you to be okay.”

She was standing absolutely petrified. She was in tears and shaking. I knew that if I tried to hug and tell her that everything would be okay she would just push me away. She began to wipe her tears with her sleeve and walked towards me.

“I really want to kiss you. So fucking badly. ”

“Then do it.”

Before she could say anything I slammed our lips together. She grabbed the back of me neck while I put my hands on her waists to bring her closer.  I deepened the kiss more and more as her tongue danced with mine. There was a knock on the door then it flung open and the kiss was pulled away immediately.

“Alexis why aren’t you in your room?”

She hid her arm underneath my blanket.

“Sorry, I just needed to ask calum something. Five more minutes?”

“Four.”

The nurse walked out and we both sighed in relief.

“You know you have to show someone your arm. It’s really bad, it won’t heal without going to the hospital.”

“No calum I won’t.”

She got up from my bed and went for the door. If she doesn’t tell anyone then I will. I can’t see her wrists get worse.

Alexis:

I have to get out of here. I can’t be sent anywhere else. I’m not crazy. These people think I’ve gone mad, even calum. Everyone thinks I’ve gone mad. The only person I trusted was Calum and he thinks I’m crazy and that I should be sent somewhere else. Maybe that whole ‘you can trust me’ act was fake. That kiss was different I couldn’t even get it out of my head.

“Check ups!” the nurse came in quick to check on me, smiled, and then shut the door. I was still hiding my dried up bloody arm.

I was thinking maybe if I bashed my arm off my desk a couple more times I could bleed to death. Then this will be all over. I won’t have to go to a different facility and I won’t have to go through all this pain. So then I started.

Bash after bash I started feeling light headed. The floor was filled with blood and tears.

“She in here!”

I was suddenly getting pulled out of room onto a stretcher. Everything started becoming blurry but I could see Calum standing behind everyone. My blood started to boil and I was so mad that I got enough energy to scream at him.

“You did this!”

“You needed help, I wasn't going to sit there and watch you die!”

“Why did you tell them? I trusted you!”

“You needed help!”

“You think I needed help? Well you obviously don’t know me at all Calum. I never needed help. I never needed someone to save me. I needed death. You think I want to be in this shit you call the world Calum? No I don’t. Look what you’ve done!”

Before he could say anything back I was rushed out of that mental place. I was praying that I hurt myself to the point where all the stitches came out and cut my arm open, and that I was going to bleed to death. I was praying I didn’t need to go back there and that I could die in this stretcher. I was praying I’d never see him again.

Everything at this point was blurry and I could barely breathe. I saw the red and blue flashing lights and heard the loud siren, but that’s it. That’s all I remember at this point. I couldn’t even tell you if I was alive right now.

ouuuuuch.

okay so i'm actually getting some reads on this? 

weird.

i didn't think anyone would actually read this.

comment if you guys are enjoying this story!

do you think alexis will live?