Bella's Diary (Update)

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I couldn't see straight when Carlisle told me Charlie flat lined...

He had only flat lined for a quarter of a second before Carlisle was able to bring him back. Dr. Cullen works wonders. He is the most amazing doctor around, and I am truly so thankful for him.

The bad news? Charlie has an infection where the bullet was lodged. He is taking antibiotics and Carlisle is keeping a close eye on him. We all are. I am so grateful for Sue too. She has been with Charlie the whole time. Never leaving his side. When she thought no one was watching, she would begin to cry while holding his hand.

Charlie sleeps most of the day, in his hospital bed. He has to stay there until the infection clears up. It is important for him to relax and for his infection to be monitored.

I am so grateful that my Dad is still alive. If he only knew what I did to the people that did this to him. If he only knew what I was. I wish I could tell him. I wish I could tell Charlie that I am his vampire daughter, and that Nessie is his half vampire, half human granddaughter. I am a bad liar, always have been. I think if Charlie were to ever ask me about it, I would be honest. I know that no matter what, he would love me. Besides, Alice had a vision of him finding out in the near future.

My Mother, Renee, went back to Phoenix this morning, as soon as she found out that Charlie would be okay. She had obligations there, with Phil. During her visit, I avoided her as much as possible. I knew she would notice my changes. I knew she would question me. Which she did. "Bella, your face is somehow more pale than usual. And you look like you've been working out a lot. And what's with your eyes?"

Oh boy.

I really began to appreciate Charlies "don't ask, don't tell" motto. Basically, I just told her that I'd been working out with Edward, and mentioned that we had bigger things, like Charlie, to worry about. She could tell I didn't want to talk about myself during this tough time, and quickly let it go. Thankfully.

Edward, Alice and I are due for a hunt soon. We're going to go out tomorrow once Esme, Nessie and Jake come for their shift at the hospital. We're all taking shifts, and pretending we have to go home to sleep. We have to try to remember to do human things, and fit in with normal human behavior.

Right now though, I am going to grab Nessie and Edward and head over to be with Charlie. Carlisle said his heart rate speeds up when he senses that I'm there. It makes him happy. I will keep you posted on Charlie's progress, of course.

I have to run now. Edward is giving me that look that instantly melts me. The one that tells me he wants to kiss me really bad...

-Bella

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