I'm What Dreams Are Made Of. (A Highschool Jahvie)

Chapter 22- Walking Alone.

JAYYS POV-

I tugged on Daniels hand as we stormed through the door.

A broken boy and a familiar friend.

"Daniel." I whispered softly as soon as we got out through the doors, looking into his brown almost lifeless eyes.

"I wanna be alone this afternoon.." I mumbled, lightly taking my hand away from his and fiddling them together, staring at my moving thumbs and his wandering eyes.

"Of course.." He said, sighing lightly before taking a few steps ahead of me and looking back, "I'll see you tomorrow?" He said, sounding like more of a question than a statement.

"Yeah.." I mumbled, waiting for him to leave my sight before I started to walk back on my own. It was slightly windy, the wind brushing past my jet black ash-like hair. I lightly hugged myself, giving myself some warmth, shivering lightly before starting to walk home.

Walking alone was lonely.

After I got home I closed the door shut and walked up to my room. Throwing the backpack on the floor, and laying down on my bed. Cuddling two stuff animals. One was from Dahvie one time we went out to the carnival.

It was a cute fluffy blue bear holding a small yellow flower. Inside the flower it said: "Forget me not."

I froze, is that why my heart seems too unsteady?

Dahvie..

I forgot all about him, how could I?

He was the one who made me believe in love. He taught me how to love.

Does Dahvie hate me? ;-;

I don't want him too.. I love him.. I always want to be there for him but..

I think the worst part of practically all of this is that the day Daniel came was the day I was going to ask Dahvie to be mine. But of course, Daniel had to ruin it all and mess with my emotions and feelings.

I love Dahvie dearly but he would never love me back. Especially due to the past few weeks. He would never forgive me. I would be the one to be unforgiven.

A tear fell down my cheek as I started reminiscing. Remembering all those fun days with Dahvie which made my life worth living. His bright smile and his gorgeous eyes. But I probably ruined it all.. </3

Great job Jayy.. Great job.

"I'm just a pathetic human.." I though sadly, burying my eyes into my hands, tears flowing to my wet hands.

Tears started to form in my eyes. They fell gently, falling down my cheeks as if they depended on it. One by one, more by the second. I've made so many mistakes, how does the rest of the group even deal with me? Oh.

They don't anymore. They don't tolerate my bullshit. More tears dripped onto my hands, crying seemed like the only answer. The only thing that seemed that I could do. There was no other answer. I've been doomed from the beginning and I can't escape this fate.. I don't have anyone anymore. Not even Nathan, who's been there for me for practically forever. Who knows where he is..

Everyone's been avoiding me when I think Im in utter nirvana. I would think my friends would support my decisions. Like Dahvie. What's going on with Dahvie? He and Nathan didnt come to school today. Nathan slapped me and started to yell at me earlier..

"BOYFRIEND?!?! JAYY YOU ARE SUCH BULLSHIT! YOU KNOW WHAT? DONT EVEN BOTHER TRYING TO TALK TO THE REST OF THE GROUP AFTER ALL THAT YOU'VE DONE." Another tear strolled down my cheek, what have I done? What did I do wrong? Why am I excluded from the people who make me happiest? Why am I treated this way now?

I reached in my pocket and took out my iPod, taking it and pressing the home button, showing me the lockscreen, everyone at Cassie's birthday party- even Dahvie. That was a nice day.. I smirked at the memory, then pushing the arrow and putting in the password. I went to my music and put on "The Used." The Used always helps me get through things. I then picked up my phone from the desk, calling Nathan's numbers and just wishing that somebody would pick up.

No one.

I tried again, but it seemed like how many times I tried, nobody would answer. Like nobody cares.

I hugged a pillow, thinking of what I've done. I've abandoned Dahvie, and all of my friends, over a stupid boy.

A stupid boy I love.

I stood up again, jamming my iPod in my pocket and walking toward my door. I walked down the stairs and through the front door. Deciding to take a lonely walk in the rain.

I put my hoodie hood over my head and jammed my hands through my hoodie pocket. Not knowing where to go, but just wanted an escape. Somewhere to go.

I walked, step by step as the rain pouted. I heard thunder but I didn't really care. I then spotted the old park Dahvie and I used to go to. I smiled lightly at the memory before I walked closer to the monkey bars and wrapped one of my hands around the red chipped pole that connected the monkey bars. I remember that one time Dahvie and I were just sitting here in the good old days.

"Need anyone?" I heard a deep voice ask. I turned around, giving the man a light smile before getting up to him and giving him a kiss on the cheek, "Just you Daniel." I said, giving his a warm smile though I was in the business of misery.

Daniel smiled as I got under the umbrella, "Lets sit on the monkey bars and talk about this. My Jayybear seems unhappy." Daniel said, having a solemn face.

Wait did he say Jayybear?

"Okay." I replied, still shocked at such a nickname, reminding me of Dahvies bright eyes when he called it, and my beaming smile when he said it.

We sat on the monkey bars together, my feet over the bar, the umbrella over us to keep us not getting wet from the rain.

"It's Dahvie..~"