the most wattpad story ever!!!! #OMG #Wattys2019

3 - DETENTION?!?

Last week on 'the most wattpad story ever', Tamara was wrongfully incarcerated by Principal Snape after disemboweling her arch nemesis with a rather large katana in the middle of the school cafeteria. How will she ever get out of this jam? Stay tuned to find out! Or don't, it's not like this story has any credible direction to follow.

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Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.

It was a clock, by the way. Yeah, a clock. That's how we're starting this chapter. Smooth transition, huh? Anyway, there was a clock and it was in the detention hall after school. Good thing Tamara North Dizzle noticed it, or else there'd be a more jarring opening paragraph for us to deal with.

The silky-haired brunette stared out of the sun-veiled window, trying to control her burning loins as the thousands of bad boys of their school surrounded her central throne. They swapped war stories of how they were imprisoned there, trying to make themselves sound badass in front of the only jaw-droppingly beautiful girl to get detention.

"I stole the exam answer sheets and sold them to the 'slow' class."

"Yeah? Well, I put a pin on the counselor's chair when she wasn't looking!"

The group of bad boys glanced over at Tamara, sizing her up with a certain cheesiness you would only find within 1950's greaser cliques. "What about you, dollface? What're you in for?"

"I cut my best friend's chest open with a nihontō and rained her blood on the entire cafeteria, accidentally giving half of the school Hepatitis B."

"Woah. That's hardcore. What's your name, baby?" One of the boys leaned closer, gazing at the raw image of Greek beauty she was, despite her skin being whiter than winter snow.

"My name is I-have-a-boyfriend. Get lost," Tamara turned to scoff at him. When she did, her emerald eyes shimmered at the sight of Brody at the far end of the hall, having sunk so far into the corner that not even the sunlight could reach him. Blinking her sapphire eyes at him, she knew she could do what Helios' bright sun could not.

Sliding her chair across the entire detention hall, none of the teachers looked up or even noticed her as she squeaked her way towards the enigmatic heart throb. Her gums salivated in anticipation, drooling into her lap as she wondered what mysteries their forbidden infatuation could bring.

"Brody? You're in detention, too?"

His half-hidden face poked out from his hood, turning to recognise her before slamming down hard on his desk.

"Crap. Not you again."

"What are you doing here? Did you get in trouble just to see me?" Tamara's hand placed itself lightly on her chest, a little flattered at the notion. "I don't blame you, but you should know that I have a—"

"I don't want anything to do with you. Really," he sneered, tucking himself so deep into his hoodie that it almost defied spacial reasoning. "I feel bad for Dustin. Must be hard, putting up with a self-absorbed moron like you."

"Um, it's Justin I'm dating now?" Her heart trembled, giving her pause as she rested her hand on his lap. "At least, for the moment. What are you doing later?"

"Taking innocent people's blood."

"I knew it. Because you're a vam—-"

"Because I work with the school nurse, idiot. Detroit was hit with a Hepatitis B epidemic because of your little stunt today, so thanks for all of the extra work I need to do now."