On the Inside

Chapter 5 - Last Glance

I got back to the entrance when I realized someone coming in through the other door. It was David and Amber. No. They couldn't see me like this. I had only met them yesterday. But so many things had happened since then. I felt like I've known them for so long. Maybe it was because they were the only people I actually had contact with after so many years. I quickly hid the wet part of my shirt I had just washed off the stains from.

They saw me and started walking towards me. A smile appeared on Ambers face as she waved. I found myself smiling back hoping they wouldn't be suspicious about anything. To shorten the distance, I walked towards them. Though, the two entrances weren't that far away from each other. Finally they came up to me. I was glad that I came with the same disguise as yesterday.

"Hey, Alex. We didn't think we'd see you again."

"Yeah...", I agreed while my thoughts were somewhere else. All that came to my mind were flashes of what had just happened minutes ago in my car.

"Are you alright?" David questioned like he had noticed something. I shook my head immediately. " Yeah, I'm fine....How are you guys?". It sounded more like a lie. My lies usually sounded pretty natural but this one just came out wrong.

"We're fine. Amber's returning some books back and then we're headed to the park". I was trying my best to pay attention.

"Can you come with us?", Amber mumbled. David nodded in agreement with Amber's question. I suddenly stopped. Me? Go with them? What if that F.B.I guy came again? What would happen if someone recognized me and called the police on me in front of them? After all, I am on the most wanted list of Queens, New York where we live.

But the other side of me was telling me something else. It was telling me to risk it. To go along and change things a little. But nothing would ever change. And if it did, things would just get worse. That's how it always was and will be. I snapped out my thoughts and decided to do a stupid thing again. ".... okay", I shrugged hesitantly.

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David and I were sitting on the bench watching Amber rock back and forth on the swing. The only sounds around me were the songs of birds chirping, the smooth small ripples of the lake, and the annoying screeching noise of the swing chains. I had walked with them to the nearby park and said I didn't come with a car. If I said I had, then maybe we'd have to go with my car and if they saw it later somewhere else, I'd be screwed.

" So... tell me about yourself", he broke into the silence.

I kept quiet for a while and then, before I knew it I was mixing up lies and truths about my life and telling it to him. Truths about my parents, the orphanage, about Ed. And lies saying Ed had an actual job, we were kicked out the orphanage (not escaped), and that we worked hard to live. Well, we did. He seemed to believe everything. I played a little with Amber. Her laughs brightened my day. Sweet, lovely, and full of hope. We ran and had fun together in the soft green grass and enjoyed ourselves.

This was the first time I was enjoying being me. Even with the disguise, I was still me. Every once in a while I'd think of the bad things that might happen later. I thought how strange it was to feel so comfortable with someone this fast. I thought maybe I couldn't trust them. But there was a feeling I had that made me love being with them. A cozy feeling of belonging.

It was sunset when we stopped by Burger King to get three sandwiches for dinner. Then we said our good byes and they left. I started to walk back to the library parking lot where I had parked my car. It was warm but cold winds blew towards me pushing my "hair" back. I crossed my arms and rubbed them to keep me warm as I reached my car. I pulled out my car keys to unlock it then jumped in.