The Kingdom Thief

Chapter 36

I don't breathe. I don't think; at least not about anything except my worst nightmare coming to life right before my eyes.

As the bullet lodges itself in Kane's stomach, I can do nothing but watch his eyes widen at the impact before falling back to the floor.

I can't move. I want to move. I want to scream. I want to cry. I want to obliviate everything in my vicinity, including myself. I want to endure unimaginable pain. Anything would hurt less than the cold that covers my body at seeing my last bit of love and hope destroyed on the ground.

Kane Parson. The one thing I knew I wouldn't be the same without. The only thing I would never gamble away. Not for power. Not for life. Nothing would have made me give him up.

Because he was the best thing. Not about tomorrow or today or anything else like that, but in general. The one pure gift given to this broken world. The thing that put me back together when all I wanted to do was crumble into a heap on the floor.

He was the miracle I didn't realize until too late. I was so stupid. So stupid to play his games. I wasted so many days with him bickering when I could have been laughing. Breaking when I could have been building. Fighting when I could have been loving. Kane and I had so much time and most of it we wasted on pretending to not be able to stand each other.

And now he's gone. Now I can't tell him everything I wanted to. How I would have followed him into hell itself if he asked me to. How I would have thrown away any future in this land if he wanted to leave and set out for a new place to call home. How I would have given up anything, my titles, my claims to power, my heart, my life, if he wished for me to.

And he felt the exact same way. Loving me is the reason he now has a bullet in his side. It's my fault, all my fault. If I had never decided to let him love me, it would be me with the bullet through me. Not him. And, knowing that it is supposed to be me bleeding out on the floor instead of him, is the worst pain of all. It is the pain that blinds me. The pain that shatters me.

I hear the click of an empty chamber behind me and hear Jack curse. I slowly turn around, not knowing how long I have stood staring at Kane's body. It feels like years. Centuries.

Jack is pointing a gun at me and repeatedly pulling the trigger. He has no more bullets.

Jack just tried to kill me. And he would have succeeded if he didn't waste his last bullet on Kane.

And a horrible, selfish part of me curses the gun for not having one last bullet to give.

Wren and Mason's screams finally sound in my head. How long have they been screaming like that? A bullet whizzes by me, barely missing the pale man still pointing his useless gun at me.

Jack curses again before grabbing me and moving my body in front of his. The bullets stop ringing as Jack steps back, opens a door, and drags us through it.

I allow him to shut the door behind us. I allow him a moment to catch his breath before turning slowly towards him again.

"Congratulations" I finally find the strength to speak.

Jack gives me a confused look before trying to get by me.

My arm juts out so fast that even I am surprised by the speed. I shove him back against the wall as easily as I might have swatted away a fly.

"Congratulations" I repeat. "You just killed the one reason I would ever possibly have mercy on you. You just took away all of the humanity I had left in me."

My smile is so wicked and demonic that Jack cringes at the sight of it, leaning as far into the wall as he can.

"You know what happens when you kill somebody's reason to stay a good person?" I ask, stepping closer to the concerned boy. Whispering, I answer my own question. "They have nothing left to lose."