"sometimes being free means choosing to stay."
Haley Sloane Wilder is ready to leave her hometown the moment her bank account strikes the right digits.
With a year left to reach her goal, Haley is barely hanging on as she struggles to live in this...
"And that's it for today. Reminder to hand in your photos by the end of this week for consultation before you start on your final portfolio, but since none of you are actually listening by now so good luck all of you on passing this class."
Mr Clark, as usual, made his sarcastic outro with an eyeroll at the end of class and proceeded to leave. The rest of the students soon followed after.
I added on Mr Clark's reminder to today's post it notes for assignments. Opening up my notebook, I slot it in and checked the note I wrote for the end of this class. Easily, I found the green note under today's date.
[CHECK AFTER PHOTOGRAPHY CLASS] - Put on watch, it's in the bag. (there's no clock in next 2 classes) - Next class is History. It's right next to the staircase outside of current class. - Take water bottle from under table. ...
I checked through every detail, my heart calming as I finished up each point. To any other student, my notebook looked just like a simple organizer, colour coded based on either assignments or classes, updated on a regular basis.
This notebook was definitely way more than that. It was my guide through every day, and without it I'd lose the ability to function. It was updated with post it notes every single morning without fail, colour coded based on my daily schedule.
Green notes were for assignments, Pink for after class reminders, Yellow for house reminders, Blue for night job reminders & Orange for loose reminders. I wasn't kidding when I said I was forgetful.
Satisfied with everything in place, I packed up and left for my next class.
~
I breezed through the classes pretty smoothly today, which was a rare chance I appreciated. Checking through my post it notes again, I organized my locker and took out the books I needed tonight.
My phone alarm rang as I finished up, indicating 3 hours before my night job today. I shut it off, and a text from my father appeared too.
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[media text: Doctor Jenn would like to see you today. ??? i have work tonight Just for a short while. Drop by before work, please. I can drive you if your time is tight.
it's fine, i'm on it Let me know if there's anything.]
My mood dimmed, thinking of all the past dreadful appointments with my psychiatrist. I wrote down a new note for the appointment, making a new list as I checked back my old notes as well.
"Haley!" a familiar voice called. Turning towards the voice, I saw Flora headed towards me.
It's been a while since I saw her. Her blonde hair had grown a little longer, and today she's wearing it down, having it flow lightly across her shoulders instead of her usual messy ponytail.
Other than that, her appearance remained the same as before. Her face lightly concealed with not too much of make up, giving more attention to her friendly blue eyes. Dressed in a simple black one piece romper, it hugged her softly tanned athletic body nicely.
On her neck rested a cute, dainty necklace with a volleyball charm given by her long time boyfriend Jonah. Both of them played volleyball together, captains of the school's boys & girls' teams respectively. Talk about power couple.
"Flora," I greeted.
"The heck is this formality Hails?" Flora questioned with a playful smirk.
"I barely said your name, how's that formal?"
"You say it like I'm about to meet you as a business client," Flora joked.
"Stop attacking me," I gave her a fake frown and we both laughed a little.
I was in all ways grateful for Flora. When Lara passed, I shoved everyone out of my life, cutting off all contact with my previous social circle. They were more of Lana's friends than my own anyway. I didn't see a point in keeping them. It hurt to as well, because they were all heavy reminders of Lana's absence.
Flora was the only one who forced her way through to me, and the only one who was equally a friend of Lana and myself. Even though I had pushed her away, as my friend, she understood where I was coming from and proceeded to give me space, but never once allowing me to cut her out of my life.
She left me alone most of the time just as I liked, but made sure to check on me every once in a while to ensure my well being. That girl even set her number on my phone as speed dial 1. Today was another of her check in days.
"I have something to ask of you," Flora said, almost hesitant.
I raised an eyebrow in question and nodded my head for her to continue.
"I know that you...visit Lana every second Monday of the month and..." she trailed off, and my heart sank a little hearing Lana's name. I held that in, careful not to show anything.
Flora stared at me all serious, took a deep breath and went on.
"I'd like to come with you this time, Haley."
My mouth opened into a small o in shock, and I wasn't too sure about how to feel about her request.
"W-what?"
"Let's hang out again, the three of us. It's been a while."
I stared at her blankly.
"I know you haven't moved on, Hails. It's been 2 years and you haven't moved one bit from where you were before."
I looked away. Her words hit me hard because every part of it was true. I was still stuck with remembering every single bit of Lana.
"I...I don't know," I protested weakly.
"I've always given you space, but I think you've had enough. Perhaps you're not ready to let go yet but even so, I'd still like to come with you for old times sake. You don't have to open up if you don't want to, but let's reunite this month at least. The 3 of us."
Flora said all of these with a sincere smile, and I started to feel like it might be okay to say yes. She looked at me hopefully, kindness bright in her blue eyes.
After a long pause, I agreed softly.
Flora squealed and pulled me into a hug. I freezed immediately by instinct, caught off guard by the sudden contact. I reminded myself that it's Flora and I relaxed soon after, willing myself to breathe before my breath caught.
Flora pulled back just as suddenly as she had hugged me, a guilty look on her face.
"Crap, sorry I forgot to warn you."
"Don't worry, I'm fine," I reassured her, even though I knew I could have fallen into another panic attack if I hadn't reminded myself on time that it was just Flora.
The guilt on Flora's face doesn't leave, and she released her hold on me completely. I reached for her hand and gently squeezed it with a smile.
"I'm not lying, I'm really fine."
Flora contemplated for another moment before giving in to trust my words. She squeezed my hand back.
"Take care of yourself, Hails. I'll see you on Monday by the tree?"
I nodded.
"Remember that I'm always here for you, Haley. You just have to call."
Flora looked me right in the eyes to make sure I really know that. I did, I just couldn't find it in myself to rely on anyone yet.
"Of course, I'll let you know if there's ever anything. And I have to go, my dad wants me to drop by Doctor Jenn's office today."
I leaned in for a brief side hug and left before Flora could doubt my words again. Once my back was against her, any trace of smiling vanished from my face.
