BRAVE

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Being brave isn't something you can be or do. It is something you learn over time. Being brave is being ready to face and endure danger or pain, but show courage at the same time.

You as a person can choose to be brave and put your bravery to the test, but only you can do this, no one else can tell you to be brave or help you to be. You have the choice and the ability to do something out of your comfort zone whether it be coming forward and telling the truth or just being able to speak out for yourself. Or it could be something you've always wanted to do, such as skydive or push yourself to the limits. It took me a few months after the assault for me to realise that I was and still am brave. No one told me or showed me how to be brave. It is something that just happens one day and you end up walking with your head held higher than ever before.

I was so scared to go to the police. I didn't want to believe that I had been raped. I didn't want to believe that someone who I was once close to, could do something that would completely destroy me. A person living in a very messed up world, but also a person who is loved, by not just family but friends as well. It is something that I will never be able to forget but I will be able to forgive.

For me, finding enough courage to go to the police was a lot for me as I didn't want to recall the assault that happened  the night before. But by being able to give my statement made me realise that I am brave. This was the point where I realised that being brave is a lot harder when you are having to relive through something, that has no only scarred you physically, but mentally too.

All I keep hearing from people, family and friends is that I am brave and I shouldn't let anyone tell me otherwise. At the beginning I didn't believe them but I do now. I am brave. If I didn't go to the police and have my voice be heard, I wouldn't have had a case. Being brave is so hard. Only you can be brave and you cant listen to anyone else. It's your choice at the end of the day if you speak out.

Bravery also comes with courage, strength and knowing who you are as a person. I had none of these in February 2017. I was a scared girl who had no idea what to do. I struggled everyday and will do for the rest of my life, but only I can change that.

I don't want to struggle anymore. I won't struggle anymore. I am Brave. I am strong and I have the courage to keep fighting this battle. This battle is far from over but it is a battle I no longer have to face on my own. I have family and friends to stand beside me through this.


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