I was waiting in Eros’ palace, Hera and Gabe discussing things quietly in the living room. Mostly, Gabe was desperately vying for the goddesses’ attention. It should have bothered me, seeing my ex-boyfriend fawn over the very beautiful queen of the universe, but it didn’t. At least not it did not inspire jealousy like it should have, because really, I was done with Gabe. And not in the “I just got slipped this love potion and now I’m a romantic zombie” sort of way. I just felt like Aphrodite’s antics had done Gabe and I a favor breaking our unhealthy attachment. The love we’d had inspired ourselves to do stupid things, like trade in our souls or sleep with Hades, and that wasn’t right. Love made you better, and we’d warped our feelings into something deformed and possessive. Like a black hole, our love had been more of a chasm in our lives sucking out what was left of our long dead souls. Perhaps that is why we didn’t try to resist the love spells, because theoretically, that was possible. But we hadn’t even tried to resist, we just submitted and enjoyed the ride.
And what a ride it was, loving Eros. I knew I needed help, because my current state was more of a stalker than a girlfriend. But at the same time, I knew I’d have gotten here somehow on my own eventually. I did love him, truly and deeply, underneath the haze my head was in. How would I get him to see that, considering everything that had happened? He’d literally asked me to stab myself, and I gleefully complied. But underneath that ever compliant Macy was the real girl, the one who wanted to jokingly tease Eros just as much as she wanted to kiss him without feeling guilt. Underneath the girl who would agree to anything to be with Eros was me, the girl with a million doubts and fears but an overwhelming affection for the man who’d still by my side as I literally went to hell and back. I watched as Carmen perused the library quizzically.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
“I am looking for a book about the Oracle,” Carmen said. “But for a god, Eros’ library sure does look like the Young Adult section of a trendy bookstore.”
“He loves the Gossip Girl books,” I said. “Don’t tell him I told you.”
“Did you just tease him?” Carmen asked. “There’s the Macy I know.”
“Well, when he’s not here, it’s like I can speak freely,” I said, realizing it. “But when he enters the room, I become the bumbling idiot. It’s so frustrating.”
“So,” Carmen said. “Not that I can fully trust you, since your brain is on love potion, but let’s chat. If Aphrodite hadn’t interfered, would you still want him?”
“Yes,” I said. “It would have happened slowly, but it would have happened. I tend to move in centimeters, not in miles. It’s probably what made Eros suspicious. I practically begged him to sleep with me, which is a bit embarrassing. I actually tried to seduce him, the god of seduction.”
Carmen laughed and so did I, happy to realize I was still me outside of Eros’ presence.
“Now I am afraid,” I said. “That he’ll never trust that I do love him. I know he never wanted me to be like this. But I still feel things, real things. I still want him, spell or not.”
“I know,” Carmen said. “Jericho knows it. Probably any soul with half a brain cell left knows how you feel about each other. Lord only knows why you’ve pretended to be just friends for so long.”
“He can’t even look at me,” I whispered. “And when he does, all I can do is grin like an idiot. Who would love that? I adore you, I worship you. It’s super annoying.”
“So, let’s work on finding out about this oracle,” Carmen said. “I want to find out if there is a way to bribe the oracle, you know.”
“Carmen, I don’t think it works like that,” I said. “Aren’t they just mouthpieces for the gods?”
YOU ARE READING
Bows and Eros
Teen FictionWhen sixteen year old Macy wakes up in purgatory, she knows something isn't right. She was supposed to survive the surgery and live a long happy life. But when she meets an odd man named Zed, who is a reaper for the underworld, she learns she died e...
