e·phem·er·al:
lasting for a very short time.
"With your wholesomeness, I can become fixed"
A Nam JooHyuk and Lee SungKyung story
Was: Broken, but not unfixable
Started: August 30, 2017
Completed: N/A
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January 5, 2006; Seoul
warm: having, showing, or expressive of enthusiasm, affection, or kindness. LSK
it had been five days since my little 'incident' and i've been silent every since. joohyuk continuously visits, but i've isolated myself from everyone since that night. it might have been surprising to him, but he couldn't imagine how surprising it was to me. of course i often think about leaving this ugly world, but i never would have thought of leaving like that. for the sake of sunghee and my aunt, i don't think i'd ever do that again.
i come back from taking a shower in my towel and collapse onto my bed. with winter break ending in a month, i'm starting to get stressed just thinking about the mounds of homework that i'll have to tackle once it begins, not to speak about exams. "kyung!" i turn around to see my door swing open. i'm frozen on my bed, in my towel with no clothes on. if it was because of the fact i hadn't changed into clothes, or because he was shooting me a cold stare, either way, i couldn't move.
he swiftly locks the door, turns around and sits cross legged in front of it. "get out!" i yell and he shakes his head no. "i'm not leaving until we finally talk. with your clothes or with-" "shut up!" i scream and grab my clothes and rush to my washroom. i lock the door and sit on the toilet cover. i could practically see his stupid smirk forming and i roll my eyes. he just never takes no for an answer. "i'm not leaving this bathroom." "i'm not leaving your room." i sigh and start to change. i put on my pink sweater and tights.
"sunghee is really worried about you." he starts. i hear a thud against the door and i sit back on the cover. "she really thinks you're gonna do something bigger and i can't keep reassuring her you're not going to if i hear nothing from you." my eyes start to water but i quickly wipe them. stop acting like a prissy bitch. "kyung?" "go away."
i hear a faint sigh. i stay in there for 20 minutes or so until i hear a door open and shut. finally given the chance to breathe, i open the bathroom door to be proved sadly and utterly wrong. i'm tackled onto the bed, hard. i am face to face with a more stern looking joohyuk. "as i said, i'm not going anywhere until we talk." he repeats. he stares me down and i give him another famous eye roll and push him off me. i sit up and he does the same, sitting close to me.
"i don't want to talk about this." i whisper looking down at my toes. the room grows quiet and i feel knots form in my stomach thinking back on it. i'm snapped out of my thoughts when something is passed to me. "happy belated." he says. "it's that album you've been looking at for a while now." i open up the packaging to see the japanese album i had been struggling to find. my moms favourite artist seiko matsuda's sweet memories '93. "where did you-" "where's your walkman?" i look at him still confused but get up and bring it over. he opens up the cd case and proceeds to insert the disc in the player.
i hand him an ear bud and we both flop onto the bed, listening to the sweet tunes of matsuda's voice. i close my eyes and find little recollection of the memories of my mother and i, how she use to sing this song before bed, in the car, and all around the house.
I don't remember too much about my mother, other than the fact that because of me she's in that state. I do remember this song. Maybe it was because she wanted to have a connection with my dad better or maybe she just stumbled across this song. Either way, it hurts to listen to.
tears start to well up once again and i let them go this time, feeling unsteady and chest heaving too hard for me to breathe properly. i finally lose it when comes the second chorus and start bawling and joohyuk lies down next to me, listening to my cries.
"i just want you to know that i'm here and so is sunghee and so is elhyun. please just don't ever even think about it, please." i look over to him, his eyes desperate, looking for reassurance and I give him that. i move in closer to him, "thank you." i whisper.
one of my very few saviours that keep me sane while living this shitty place called life. though he annoys the living shit out of me, i'm glad to have such a twisted and wonderful boy in my life.
- A/N i haven't updated since august lmao I hate me too-
this was a really short chapter but I promise more chapters to come !!