She's too perfect

Asking for help

I open my eyes and stare at the ceiling for a bit, it was dark, it should be early. I turn myself and see Elizabeth sleeping so calmly with a smile, still in nothing but underwear. I stop staring at her and start to think about last night. "I dont think im going to be able to handle this, she is just too excited... I need help" I notice that she is not wrapping me strongly so I slowly get her tail of me trying not to wake her up. finally i'm free, I look at the clock, 6: 24 AM. Typical of me. I put on my shoes and leave the room quietly. "I need to go with Javier" 

Javier is my downstairs neighbor, his family is known to be rich but somehow he leaves in just the same conditions than me. He is a good friend of mine, since I moved here he's been very nice. They say he has some good problem resolution skills... mostly cause everyone in his family is rich and they always borrow him money. But I'm just going to talk with him and see if he has any idea to help me out.

I go downstairs quickly, I live in the 3rd floor. I'm about to knock on his door but i remember it's 6AM. I think about it for a bit and finally knock on his door. for my good luck, he was awake. He slowly opens the door -Heeeeey duuuude... what brings you to my place?- he always has this way of talking, like he was on marijuana or something. -I, uhm, would like to talk to you, i'm in a bit of a problem here and I don't know what to do- He opens the door completely and lets me in. -Come in bro, always glad to help- his place was a bit fancier than mine, also a lot of white, i've been in his house before but i always find it weird how did he decided to live in a apartment instead of a big fancy house like the rest of his family. I enter and wait for him  -Come to the couch and tell what is the problem- we both sit on his long fancy white couch. Just before i say a word he speaks -Hold up, it's with your snake girlfriend am I right?- I nod

-she is very full of energy, i've seen her, a lot of people know her cause you know... snake girl, that not very usual- he reaches out for a bottle of beer and starts drinking -So what's the problem?- I sigh -She is just... how can i say it? too perfect, I love her but she loves me back like 10 times more. last night things got... a little bit intimate and i couldn't handle it, it's just too much for me.- Javier puts his hand on my shoulder and shakes me -Dude dude dude, Eskild my friend, you know how much stuff she's been through? she is a snake girl, and not a lot of people are into that, finding you to her means waaaaay more than what you think. Of course she is excited- I take a deep breath -I didn't think about that way, it makes a lot of sense, but still, I'm not prepared for all of this, how can I make her go just a little bit slower?- Javier takes another sip from his beer -Why don't you just tell her to go slower? just go like "hey go a little bit slower girl, just relax and enjoy the moment"- he says with a smile -I can't just tell her to slow down! what if that makes her feel bad? There must be something else I can do- Javier stands up and looks at me -Ok duude, I think I have what you need- he walks into his room. I sit in the couch and wait. after a bit he comes out with what it seems to be a parchment  

-this will help you out bud- I stare at the rolled piece of paper, it seemed ancient -What is this, some sort of spell or something?- He laughs -I have no idea- he throws his can of beer to the floor and steps on it -You're joking right? how is this going to help me?- he hands over the parchment to me -Listen, i know it sounds weird but trust me. my parents gave me that thing and they were like "oh yes that thing can solve any problem you have, use it wisely, bla bla bla" but I don't have any problems so you can have it buddy- I open the parchment and see some sort of instructions to what it seems like a demonic ritual. I look at my watch and my paranoia tells me that Elizabeth could be awake by now. I sigh -Well thanks for the help Javier- I stand up and roll the parchment again -Anytime bro, anytime- we shake hands and I exit his house.

I walk back upstairs and enter my home again quietly. I go to check my room and for my surprise, Elizabeth was not there. her jacket was also gone from the couch so I assume she left. I sigh and stare at the parchment "solve any problems... meh" I go to my room and hide the parchment in a drawer. then i sniff myself, I stink, it's been like 5 days since i took a bath. I decide to take a bath. I go to my bathroom and start filling the bathtub, after it's filled I place my phone in the sink and put Macintosh Plus, it's a good relaxing song. I undress and get into the bathtub, the water was warm and nice and everything was calm, until I hear the bathroom door open. I get immediately paralyzed and my mind fires up a ton of thoughts of what could it be, none of them made sense -Do you mind if I Join you?- It was Elizabeth.