Madness

chapter 3~her darker reflection

A monster, it snickered like old paper. A murderer, it laughed with a twisted malice, a cheat...

As Elena woke up she found the words had melted away like figments of a memory. The dull ache from yesterday had vanished like breath from glass leaving Elena feeling empty like a cracked shell of a human.

What is happening to me? Elena thought limply, this isn't normal and it scares me. It really scares me...

A sharp knock followed the far of mutterings. Startled, Elena jumped. Again, it came like an unexpected nightmare, knock. Maybe if she just ignored it, the visitor would leave. Elena had been ignoring a lot of things lately in hopes that they would just disappear like they had never existed. She could only pretend she was okay for so long.

The room was grey. There was nothing to it but the odd movements around the house that suggested it was late afternoon. Something scratched against her check. Elena pulled out a few more leaves from her hair, hastily. Wearily, Elena scratched at her hair and to her surprise found more pieces of leaves and small, broken twigs. Slowly, she recalled the events of earlier that day. It was foggy and disordered like she wasn't supposed to be there. She wasn't. Picking her way through the memories, Elena furrowed her eyebrows.

I didn't want to go there, I didn't think to go there. So how did I end up there? I didn't feel anything like I was just one big, empty void almost as if I was watching myself enter the graveyard. How did I even get home?

Soft twists of the memory slowly crept in like a cloud with no wind. The sharp echo of rain and flurry of footsteps were followed by a dragged image of charcoal grey and swept up black. Soon enough, a forlorn figure appeared in her mind. It was her or at least supposed to be. Elena looked lost, her skin almost a papery translucent colour. Her body was melting in the narrow streams of darkness which appeared like open seams. Elena didn't seem solid but more of a shell or a shadow with no owner. Gulping, Elena pulled herself out the jagged memory which played like a broken record. It was like watching someone else.

Her face was glazed with sweat and each creak or dragged silence was enough to make Elena shiver. Several knocks came this time. Relief came quick and a comfort. Perhaps someone was needed to take away the crumpled loneliness. She would do anything to swallow away the emptiness and pity which didn't really filled the absence.

Stumbling down the staircase, a weak sense of joy followed her. If whoever is at the door sees me as normal and sane then I am normal and sane and I will be alright.

As she climbed out of bed, Elena found herself staring at her reflection in the aged mirror. The white sheet which usually covered it had fallen off- again. It didn't really seem daunting anymore and she wasn't quite sure why.

Peering closer into her smudged reflection, Elena found her hair scattered with flakes of leaves and dirt. Frowning, Elena quickly brushed through her black hair finding it scratchy and fake. It's not fair, she thought, I didn't really go out. Why is it like this?

After she raked out the last few pieces, Elena steadily looked at her reflection. She sighed. Each smudged part of the mirror adding to the vague looseness that had come with her that day. Small piles of leaves scattered the floor leaving Elena's face etched with worry.

The knocking came once more but this time more loud and real in her mind. It had almost slipped her mind like a loose marble. A sudden air of relief tickled her as Elena pulled away from the mirror.

Groans escaped from underneath the staircase as she stumbled down them and into the narrow hallway. She hated this hallway. Ever since she had moved her, only a couple moths back, Elena had taken an immediate disliking to it. Each corner was swallowed with an unearthly black which seemed to close in on Elena. Most people feared the dark; the cracks, the small places which lay between what can and can't be seen. Elena found those people to be blind for true monsters walked in the light, daily. Humans. But even this hallway clouded her conscience and made her feel slightly more aware of herself and she wasn't completely sure why.