Choices {divergent / a.i. au} | ON HOLD

{ iv }

{choices x four}

The next morning, everything passes by so quickly, as though a minute is thirty seconds long. We wake up, get ready, and drive to the Hub where the Choosing Ceremony will take place.

Calum and I have not said a word to each other since our conversation last night, and even as we scramble into the crowded elevator that will take us to the twentieth floor of the building, we both remain silent and unspeaking.

As I enter the room, my eyes are blinded by the different colours of clothing segregated all around it, just like they have always been for the past six years of me attending this ceremony.

Mom and Dad walk in before us and lead us to the area where the Amity sit. Somewhere along one of the first few rows, there are seats vacated for the dependents and their parents. Mom settles into a seat in the third row. Calum, Dad, and I follow suit, with Calum sitting next to Mom, Dad sitting next to him, and me sitting next to Dad.

As soon as everybody settles down, the ceremony begins. It goes by like it usually does, starting with an opening statement from a few leaders. Then...

The choosing.

Even after many years of watching the ceremony, I still couldn't comprehend the fact that it's my turn. I'm here. I'll be up on that stage in a few minutes and I'm going to give my blood as a sign of my loyalty. In a few minutes I will be leaving my family for good, but I will be starting a new life and that's one of the only things I have always wanted.

Several names are called. I don't pay attention. I'm scared and I'm nervous and I'm extremely unprepared for the outcomes of my choice. I zone out quite easily but I am immediately brought back to the present as my dad nudges me with his elbow. I look up at him with a questioning look.

"Yes, Dad?" I ask.

He releases a deep breath and looks at me with glassy eyes, like he knows my decision already. "It's your turn," he says softly.

I turn my head to the stage and see that nobody but Marcus Eaton, who is staring expectantly at me, is standing up there. I slowly stand up and make my way to the stage which is not too far from where I am seated. I climb up the stage, still maintaining my slow pace, and feel hundreds of pairs of eyes staring at me, wanting to know whether I would "betray" my family or not. Marcus hands me a knife and I accept it with slightly trembling hands.

"Good luck," he whispers.

I nod at him and stand in front of the bowl in the middle - the Erudite bowl. The bowl is full of water that was once clear, but is now a translucent red because of the blood that has dripped into it. On its right sits a bowl of earth representing Amity, and on the very far left, next to the bowl of stones for Abnegation, sits the bowl of live coals for Dauntless. My eyes trail along the row of bowls and settle on the coals.

With my hands still shaking, I bring the blade up to my left palm and drag it across, letting it slice through my skin. I take in a sharp breath of air. My palm is face-up, because of me not wanting to let any blood drip just yet, and my head slowly moves toward the direction of my family. I see Mom and Dad sitting with sad smiles. They know what I want.

"Go," Mom mouths. Dad inconspicuously nods along with her.

I let out the air I had been holding and think of something I learned from Faction History. In the Dauntless Faction Manifesto, there is a line that says, "We believe, not just in bold words but in bold deeds to match them." I must stay true to my word and show this through my actions. Actions speak louder than words, after all.

With my eyes closed, I move my hand over the coals, not once making a move towards the bowl of earth. My blood drips, I hear a sizzle, and I know that there is no turning back.