'I look in the mirror
And I try to see myself, My head full of terror, From the games I played so well, I try to see clearer, I try to forget the fires I started I try to be nearer To where you are'
"Is it just me, or does that girl look somewhat familiar?" Niall says.
Niall and I are currently in a hotel bar.
My head turns and I see a tall, sexy, dark-haired girl, in an outfit that looks equal parts stripper and supermodel.
"Nope. Never seen her before in my life." I say.
"Victoria's Secret!" Niall almost shouts.
"What?" I say.
"She was one of the models in the Victoria Secret fashion show." Niall explains.
"Oh." I say.
The model walks past us and gives me a seductive smile. "Hi boys." She says in a voice equally seductive voice. "Wasn't aware you were in the area." She says tilting her head at us.
"Yeah. We're on tour." I say.
"I'm Rayna." She says.
"Hi Rayna, nice to meet you." Niall says.
Rayna glances at Niall, and gives him a small smile. She then turns her attention back to me. Her eyes travel down the length of my body, her eyes linger at my lips. And I can't help but feel a little violated, but at the same time turned on. I stare at her in turn. Her short black dress is so tight, I wonder how she can breathe. It's strapless and exposes her long legs, her breasts and curves strain against the fabric.
I grin at her, and she says, "Will you buy me a drink?"
Beside me, I hear Niall give a little cough. "Um..... sure?"
"Thanks." She sits down on the empty seat beside me, "How's your tour?" she asks.
"All right." I answer. I quickly order three drinks from the young bartender.
"That's good." Rayna says with a smile.
I hear Niall mutter something about being right back, but I barely hear him because Rayna has her hand on my knee. I stare at her. Stare at her hand on my knee. She licks her lips and smiles. Clearly she's looking to get laid tonight.
________
"Girls have no more self-respect." Aria says with disgust.
"Why are you saying that all of a sudden?" I ask her. We're sitting on a park bench together, it's early spring. Aria is wearing a navy-blue sweater, skinny jeans, and black Vans. Her long hair flows down freely. It's so long, so fluid, like silk. I have to resist the urge to run my fingers through it. She's also wearing her glasses today.
"Like strippers and prostitutes." She says. "Why would you want to make a living taking off all your clothes and offering sex?" she says, "Like, ladies, where is your self-respect?"
"You're such a feminist." I laugh.
Aria ignores me and continues on with her rant "I hate how they use their physical looks to try and attract men. I think it's disgusting." She snorts, "Girls shouldn't be recognized for their physical attractiveness. It's like choosing your food for color and not taste."
"Clearly, you don't care about the way you look, then." I tease, referring to her obsession for studying herself in the mirror.
"I don't." she says.
"Yeah, because people who always look at themselves in mirrors are so humble." I give an eye-roll.
"That's different." She says. "I do not look at myself in the mirror to acknowledge my own physical attractiveness. I look in the mirror to memorize the way I look."
"What are you talking about?" I frown.
She sighs, and stares at me through the corner of eye, "This is gonna sound a little crazy, but I've never really looked at myself in the mirror up till recently."
"You're not serious." I stare at her wide-eyed.
She just nods, "I want to be able to recognize myself." She explains. "I think recognizing yourself emotionally is more important than recognizing yourself physically." She says. "But since I know who I am emotionally, I want to be able to move on to the physical side of things."
She looks at me, "That sounds ridiculous, doesn't it?"
"You've truly never looked at yourself in the mirror?" I ask.
She shrugs, "I have on rare occasions. But I never really cared to look at my face."
"Why not?"
"Harry, darling, what you must understand about me us that I have very low self-esteem." She says.
"You shouldn't." I say. "You were the one ranting on how women should have more self-respect. You should have self-respect for yourself too, Aria."
"Oh, I have self-respect Harry." She says, "What I don't have is self-esteem."
"What's the difference?" I frown.
"Self-esteem is holding yourself in high regard, which I don't do," she says, "Self-respect on the other hand, is accepting yourself for who you really are. You can dislike or like yourself for who you are, and not because of what we can or cannot do."
___________________________________
Rayna's hand is moving up my leg, and I suddenly jerk away from her. She frowns, "Harry, what's wrong?"
"I have to go." I say quickly. I throw some bills down on the counter.
"But-" she says.
But I'm already gone. I find Niall who is drinking on the other side of the bar. "What happened to your date?" he asks. Obviously, he'd already had a few.
"I don't have a date Niall." I roll my eyes.
"Yeah? What about that model?"
"She wasn't my date." I almost snap, "She's just a person with very low self-respect."
Niall stares at me, "What?"
"Never mind." I say. "Let's just get out of here."
"Yeah," he nods, "Yeah, you're right."
And with that, I drag him out of the bar.
____________________________
*THE LYRICS ABOVE ARE FROM THE SONG 'MIRROR' BY ELLIE GOULDING. THE LYRICS ARE NOT MINE. THEY BELONG THE ARTIST AND PRODUCER*
YOU ARE READING
Crooked Hearts
ФанфикOn the biggest tour of his life, Harry Styles comes across Aria Wilde, someone he thought he'd never see. She's changed. She's not the girl she used to be. But as they get to know each other once more, Harry begins to understand Aria to a point he'd...
