mortal beings; full [eng]

xvii. my confession

'Elios, will you listen to me?'

We are on the third floor of the Eiffel Tower, the place where Elios was so excited to go for his whole lifetime. I want to enjoy every single minute I have with him, here and watch his lit up face as he runs around in joy pointing down at the view below. But God sometimes can be cruel, the wind is batting against my face and might has speeded up the process.

I can feel the sun on my face but I can not see it.

'Dane, is everything, okay?'

Strangely how his voice calms me down whenever I hear him. I slowly reach out my hand to look for his, as I become me desperate, I suddenly feel the warmth of a man's hand slip in between my fingers. I know right away it's Elios's. Since I remember the sensation, the warmth, even every limes and curvatures of his beautiful slim fingers.

'I have a confession to make. Will you hear me out?'

'Go on, I will listen to whatever you say.'

I can feel his voice is trembling as well as mine.

'Elios, I'm blind."

There is a long period of silence. I squeeze his hand tight as if I'm scared that if I let go of it, he will runaway.

'I know.'

He suddenly says. There is no surprise in his tone like he has known this all along.

'How?' I ask him.

'I'm always watching you.'

'For how long?'

'Three months ago.'

'Elios, I...'

He turns me around and hugs me tight, his head rests upon my shoulders and he started talking, I'm not able to stop him.

'Listen to me, Dane. I know. I know everything from the beginning , well, not the beginning but I noticed something is happening to you. So I watch you, everyday. Remember the eggs you always make me? I can see some shells in there and I know. You even have a hard time to wash the clothes and clean the house and chop the vegetables. You were trying so hard to hide it but I love you, so I've never took my eyes off you. Even when I said that I'll got to school first when you said that you'll be running late but I didn't, I waited for you. I walked behind you every morning, making sure you won't stray off the pavement or... or anxiously seeing you cross the road and I'm scared that you'll even get lost on your way to school. Dane, I know.'

He's crying.

'I know, but I've been waiting for you to say it.'

'Elios, I'm so sorry. But I can't, I can't let you suffer like this.'

I search for his face and wipe his tears away with my sleeves. I want to kiss him but I'm afraid.

'What are you saying? I will never let you go.'

'Elios, please -'

He pulls me collar and kisses on my lips.

'Stop it, Dane. If you can't see anymore, I will be your eyes. I love you.'

I can't say anything but stand silence like that in his arms, he kisses me many times and I return them. I can feel the tears rolling down from my blinded eyes as I squeeze and hug him so tight.

I love you, too, Elios.