Love, Scars, & Shooting Stars

Chapter Sixty-Two

Julie pulled her son in close and clung to him as he sobbed, ignoring the curious stares of passersby. The horrific outcomes that she hadn't allowed herself to dwell on came crashing to the forefront of her mind before spilling from her lips.

"What if you'd been kidnapped?" she choked out, holding him at arms' length as fresh tears streamed down her face. "You could've been mugged, or molested, or even killed! Jesus, Finn, what were you thinking?"

"I'm sorry, Mom," Finn bawled, his head hanging in shame. "I just wanted you to be happy—"

"And you thought that scaring me half to death was the best way to accomplish that?" she cried, her voice thick with emotion. "Seriously, Finn?"

"No, I just—" he started, before his face crumbled once more. "I'm sorry, Mom!"

Julie sighed and hugged him close again, rocking slowly back and forth as she stroked his hair.

"I know, baby, I know," she soothed. When his sobs had subsided to sniffles, Julie sank down to sit on the sidewalk beside him, the side of her body butted firmly up against his. After nearly losing him, she wasn't ready to have even a centimeter of space between them. "I'm not mad, okay? But why would you do something like this, Finn? I mean, is our life really that awful?

"No, not for me, but... you don't even have a life, Mom."

"You are my life," Julie said emphatically. "Don't you know that?"

Finn lifted one shoulder and let it drop.

"Wait a minute," Julie said, the light suddenly dawning. "Someone was supposed to be watching you...'

"Yeah, Zeke from upstairs," Finn said. "He was here for a while, but he couldn't stay."

Julie ground her teeth to keep from cursing. You couldn't even manage to do that much, Garrett?

"I'm not a little kid, Mom," her son said, as if he could hear her thoughts. "I don't need a babysitter."

Julie nodded and let it go. He's safe now, she reminded herself. That's all that matters.

"My father's kind of a jerk, isn't he?" Finn asked softly.

Julie forced a smile, swallowing the lump in her throat before she answered.

"Yeah, he is," she admitted. "But he's got some good qualities, too, and he passed a lot of those on to you."

Finn shrugged, fiddling with the cuff of his ragged hoodie. "Do you ever wish you hadn't met him?"

"No, because then I wouldn't have you, silly," Julie said, reaching over to tweak the tip of his nose. She sighed and rested her head against the stone wall behind them, her face tipped up to the late-morning sky. "I do wish that I had chosen a better father for you, though."

"You mean someone like him?" Finn asked, pointing.

Julie looked in the direction he was indicating to see Cameron exiting the bakery on the opposite side of the street, balancing a cardboard drink tray and two white paper bags as he struggled to hold the door open for a woman pushing a stroller. Julie's heart swelled with emotion.

"Precisely," she smiled sadly, realizing that she would probably have to keep her relationship with Cameron on the back burner until she'd gotten her son through this latest crisis. Was it fair to ask him to wait again, and would he even be willing to?