Favourite Girl

Chapter 10

You closed the door behind you as you reached your bedroom, needing to feel the sanctuary of the place you had once called a prison. You knew now that the real prison has in fact been the walls of your mind, walls that only two people had ever managed to knock down. Lexi and now Namjoon. You weren't perfectly sure how you felt about that as you leant against the back of the door. However an unfamiliar feeling was blossoming in your chest, a feeling that even Lexi hadn't even promoted the appearance of. Friendship and love were things that were intertwined but also entirely different. You knew that. You had loved Lexi to the ends of the earth but that was nothing compared to this. Namjoon was becoming the first man you had ever loved with such burning passion that it almost hurt. Every second away from him was beginning to feel like a waste and no matter how close he was it never quite felt close enough. You grinned widely from ear to ear. Was this really what love felt like? True, honest, pure love. When he had said he was falling for you, did that mean he felt the same? Your cheeks began to flush and your grin grew wider at the thought. Suddenly all the agony of the past you had just shared began to wash away and yet again you were able to bury your misery deep inside you. Namjoon was your second, maybe third chance at happiness. And how incredibly lucky you were to have such an opportunity.

You threw yourself into your desk chair and stared up at the poster that lay behind your desks, the poster of the boys you were about to meet. Again an overwhelming feeling of luck filled the air around you until it felt like you were sparkling, radiating happiness in a way that you had never thought was possible for you. Nothing could knock you down from the high you currently found yourself on.

You stood, stretched and concluded that you should get ready. It wouldn't be long before the boys were here. You headed over to your wardrobe and changed into black skinny jeans and a black and white striped oversized jumper. After applying your makeup and brushing your hair at lightening fast speed you made to leave your room. You opened the door but stopped abruptly at the top of the stairs when you heard voices. You felt suddenly anxious, far too anxious to move your feet. You quickly took out your phone and texted Namjoon.

-Can you come and get me? I'm nervous 🙈-

You blushed at how pathetic you sounded but sent the text anyway. Before long you heard footsteps leaving the living room and then saw Namjoon appear at the bottom of the stairs.

'What are you doing?' He laughed as he found you back behind your door, peering around its frame cautiously. As soon as he reached the top step you opened the door wider but didn't release the handle. Seeing him in front of you like that was suddenly far too surreal.

'I got nervous.' You mumbled as you looked down at your feet, shuffling them against the carpet. 

'Don't be nervous, they love you already anyway.' Your gaze shot up to meet Namjoon's with a questioning edge. 'Y/N, you are literally all I talk about. They see how happy you make me, how could they dislike someone who makes me smile like this?' Your cheeks flushed deep red and you looked down again. 'Hey, don't do that.' Namjoon stepped closer to you and took your hand in his. 'Show them the confident you that I know is hiding in there somewhere. Show them they girl I saw last night.' He placed his index finger under your chin and lifted your head so you were staring into his eyes. His face was far closer then you expected it to be and your heart rate began to spike. Only moments ago had you fully discovered your true feelings for him and you had had no idea of how much that would change things. Now you could barely look at him without having a minor heart attack, let alone the feeling of his hand holding yours. You could feel yourself shaking and you took a small step back from him.

'Are you okay? Do you want me to get them to leave? Sorry I wasn't thinking when I invited them over without asking. I'll go and tell them, just wait here.' Panic was rising in his voice and he began to turn to head back down the stairs but before he got too far you caught his sleeve between your thumb and index finger.

'No. Its okay. It's not them.' He turned back around to face you, concern laced heavily over his features, eyes searching yours.

'What is it then?' He asked.

'You.' You took a sharp intake of breath, shocked at your ow honesty.

'Me?' His voice raised a few octaves higher then normal and you realised that he perhaps misunderstood what you had said.

'No, I don't mean in a bad way.' You whispered, finally releasing his sleeve from your grasp. 'I mean, they are making me nervous. But that's nothing compared to how nervous I feel now, stood in front of you like this.'

'Like this?' Namjoon asked, taking a step towards you again, his long legs, as always, making short work of the distance between you. You looked down at your feet again.

'Like this, after realising the magnitude of my feelings for you. Some how that makes me feel more nervous now then the first time I met you. Don't get me wrong, I knew my feelings for you were strong, but then the word love popped into my head and that was fine until I actually saw you and now I don't quite know what to do with that word or the feeling...' You continued to ramble but Namjoon stopped you.

'Y/N.' You looked up at him, deep red still painted clearly across your usually pale cheeks. 'I love you too.' He said simply and shot you a perfect dimpled grin.

It was all you could do to hold yourself upright, your legs were trembling and your mind was racing over the words he had just uttered. He waited patiently, in the way he always did, for you to regain control of yourself. After a moment or so you managed just that.

'But is that okay? We've not even spoke about what this is...what we are. And we've only known each other a couple of weeks.'

'I think if we both really think about it then we already know what we are. And lucky for us, love isn't measured by time.' You smiled at the way his words found a rhythm even in small snippets of conversation like this. 'If it's any consolation, you make me feel just as nervous as I make you.' 

'Really?' You asked, and some how his words made it easier, knowing he was just as nervous made you feel better because you weren't alone in this.

'Yeah, I'm just far better at hiding it then you.' He smiled playfully as you crossed your arms and tutted, feeling slightly relaxed again.

'That's what you think.' You mirrored his playful smile and both laughed. 'Anyway, come on, they'll be wondering where we are.' Namjoon turned and began to wander slowly down the stairs. You watched as he reached the bottom and stared down at him from the top.

'Hey Namjoon,' You said as he turned around to look up at you.

'Hmm?' He hummed.

'I realised, I didn't actually say it but...' You swallowed. 'I love you.'

Namjoon beamed and quickly ran back up the stairs until he stood three steps from the top, matching his height to yours.

'You better.' He laughed, placed a quick kiss on your lips and then wrapped his arm around your waist and picked you up. 'Now come on, seriously, they'll all explode if they have to wait any longer.' And he ran down the stairs laughing as you screamed and laughed for him to put you down, even though that was the last thing you wanted.