Rejected? Whatever. (UNDER MAJOR CONSTRUCTION)

Chapter 12

It was dark outside now. 

I decided to gain some sort of trust, so it’ll be easier to get away. That doesn’t mean that I will be nice to Ryder. I have never hated anyone as much as I hate him. 

I just won’t try running away any time soon. I’ll leave in the middle of the night in a couple weeks. Hopefully when they realize that I’m not going to try to escape, they’ll let up on the guards. 

I found a backpack in the closet. I stuffed some of the more comfortable clothes that were bought for me into the bag. Inside the mini fridge, there were Cheetos and other snack sized bags of chips. Don’t ask me why he put chips in the fridge. I have no idea. I stuffed two bags into the backpack as well. I don’t think he will even notice that they are gone. 

I heard footsteps coming up the stairs, so I shoved the backpack under the bed. Not the best hiding place, but it will have to do for now. 

The door creaked open. 

Ryder. 

I sighed inwardly. I really didn’t want to deal with him.

“What do you want?” My voice was laced with venom. 

He scratched the back of his neck. My wolf softened. 

He’s sorry. She cooed.

He is a murderer! 

And Logan never killed? You’ve probably killed fifty times more wolves than he has! Logan didn’t die by his hands. He gave the order, but he didn’t snap his neck! My wolf was fed up with me. I wasn’t going to budge. By ordering Logan dead, he killed him.

“It’s past midnight. What are you still doing up?” There was concern in his eyes.

“Hmm, my fiance was murdered, our bond was broken almost killing me in the process, I was unconscious for a week, and I’m being held against my will, I can’t imagine why I wouldn’t be able to sleep.” I sneered.

He flinched at my harsh voice. “I didn’t want to hurt you, love. Believe me.” His voice was begging for me to understand.

“Then why did you?” 

“I just- You were going to leave. With. Him.” His eyes narrowed. “You’d think I wouldn’t be jealous of him anymore. I mean, he’s gone. He’s out of the picture, yet I still can’t handle how much you love him. It should be me. You should have a spark in your eyes when my name is mentioned. You should be thinking about me twenty-four seven. You should be wanting me. I hate how the fact that we’re actual mates doesn’t effect you at all. I haven’t gotten a full night’s sleep in four years!” He pulled on his hair. 

“But you, you slept with him!” His voice was starting to get louder and louder. “You know mates feel it right? When they are being cheated on? I felt it! I puked my guts out for hours! I thought of killing myself. I wanted it to end, the constant empty void inside me. If it wasn’t for Jay, I’d be dead. He found me on the bathroom floor bleeding out. A silver dagger was 1.5 centimeters away from my heart. I missed. Just my luck, huh?” There were tears streaming down his face.

My wolf whimpered. I even felt myself soften slightly. 

“At first I was just going to try again. I mean eventually I’ll succeed, but Jay told me that you would feel it. You would know I’m dead and it might even kill your wolf. Even though you were with that guy every night, I stuck it out for you. I just want to know,” He bit his lip nervously. Like my answer could break him. “do you wish I didn’t miss?”

My wolf was weeping at the thought of him dead.

“If you didn’t miss, Logan would be alive.” I whispered. Ryder’s face showed pure agony. His head dropped into his hands. “But, I don’t think my wold would have survived with you dead.” I whispered. He lifted his head up and looked at me. His eyes were red and puffy. I known Ryder most of my life, and I’ve never seen him cry before.