I've been waiting for so long in this wretched hell hole. It's been seven years since I was "rescued". The scars still remain and have also opened new ones. No one here is nice, pfft why should I expect kindness in an orphanage. It's so hard trying to wait for love, everyone wants the little kids and the older kids? It's rare to find someone who actually find someone who gives a rats ass about us. When someone does look for an older kid he/she is probably what they've been looking for, their dream child. I'm no ones dream child I'm just the leftover runt of the pack, broken from the inside out. If anyone ever came for me it would be a god given miracle, after all who wants a kid who cuts themself on a daily basis. A kid who is emotionally unbalanced. I have anxiety, I can't stand strong even if I wanted to, which I do, because if I try I'll just get another attack. I tried having hope all these years I really did, but hope can't buy you love, loyalty, caring, shelter, or safety only pure luck can grant you such pleasure, at least in a place like this. I watch all the other kids get good loving homes, hell, I've even seen biological families pick up their real children. I only have one source of happiness and i have to sneak to even get such privilege. Markiplier and Jacksepticeye, they are my heroes, in a way. I still cut and I still feel depressed they just make me not want to give up my life as much. I'd probably be dead if it weren't for them, because I have an ultimate goal, to meet them one day it would probably never happen but it keeps me motivated to stay alive. That's all that I have to say all that I have to think, there's nothing much more than that. Funny, I always told myself that right before I was gonna kill myself, but damn, Alexa seemed to always know when I was gonna do it. She was my only friend in this hell on Earth, the only actual person I could talk to, someone not through a screen. Her parents were just like mine except, they weren't abusive. My parents abused me from the time I was old enough to stand up. Then they just out and out abandoned me. How do you leave someone after 3 years of abuse? How dare you? How could you? I didn't understand, I still don't. I know I'll just be here for the next 6 years, then they'll kick me out, again, another person to just leave me. So it's just me and Alexa and we'll be here waiting.
Word count: 464
Heya fellas this is my new book! I hope you liked it and it will have more cursing than the last book and deal with serious situations such as depression and suicide if you are not comfortable with gore please do not read this book thank you very much.
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Adopted by a Markiplier
Fanfiction(Y/N) was put into the orphanage when she was 5 years old and over the years still hasn't managed to get adopted she's 12 now and is thinking of the worst, no one wants a 12 year old. Right?
