Arranged Love

Josh's Words

Maya's POV

"Josh wait," I called at him as he continued to walk towards the breakfast area. He continued on as if he didn't hear me.

"Joshua Matthews you stop walking right now!" I shouted. Several other hotel guests turned around to look at what the commotion was all about, but I didn't care. All I cared about was the fact that Josh stopped dead in his tracks and slowly turned around to face me. 

"Yes Maya Matthews?" He asked cautiously.

"What did you just say?" I asked him, my voice soft now.

"I told you, I said I love this lobby. I mean it's such a nice lobby, how could you not love it? And don't even get me started on the pool-"

"Josh we both know that's not true. Well actually it's true, this is a nice lobby, but it's not what you said and we both know that." I interrupted him.

"Maya, can we maybe not talk about this in the middle of the lovely lobby? People are staring and I don't really want an audience for this conversation." He asked me.

"Alright fine let's talk about it while we eat, I wasn't kidding when I said I was starving." I said, and as if on cue my stomach began to rumble.

"Sounds like a good plan to me," Josh agreed. 

We got our breakfast and then sat down at a table. We ate in silence for a few minutes as we both devoured our food like we hadn't eaten in days. 

"God, next time we do it we're ordering room service first." He said, looking into his croissant.

"Oh fuck yes we are," I agreed with him as I snatched the croissant out of his hands. 

"Hey!" He said as his mouth dropped open in protest.

"You can get this back when you tell me what you said." I told jim.

"Damn, I was hoping you forgot about that,"

"Well you thought wrong, now spill."

"You know I could just get up and get another croissant,"

"Yes, but I also know you're not going to. Seriously, tell me before this one gets cold."

Josh mumbled something as he looked down at his lap.

"What was that?" I asked him.

"I said I love you, okay!" He shouted. In my moment of speechlessness he jumped up from his chair and left.

I sat for a moment in shock not knowing what to do or say next. Josh said he loved me. Did he mean it? Was I supposed to say I loved him too? Even if I don't? Well, I don't wanna say I don't. But on the other hand that's not to say I don't love him. I care about him, and I was starting to think of him as a "friend with benefit" thing or whatever it was we agreed on. I don't wanna fuck that up with love. 

Oh fuck it, I thought.

"Josh wait!" I shouted to him, but he was already in the elevator. He tried to hold the door for me but he was too slow. I went on the next elevator up and found him waiting for me at the top, and he looked almost scared of what I was going to say. Frankly I was scared of what I was gonna say too, because I had no clue what I was about to say.

I grabbed his hands and looked into his eyes and just let my heart speak without concerning my brain first.

"I don't think I love you Josh," I began and his face fell. "No, I may not know if I love you, but I know I like you. Can that be enough for now?" I asked him. He didn't say anything. He just took my hand in his and pulled me along briskly to our room. 

When we got there he still didn't say anything. He just slammed the door and kissed me hard as he pressed me up against the door. I wrapped my legs around him and he carried me over to the bed. All I can say is if the first time was great, this time was off the charts.

And afterwards I heard him whisper,

"Just you being here is enough"