The Girl in the gilded cage (A Tom Hiddleston story)

What can never be

1 week later.
*Tom*
I have never felt this peaceful before. Malina has a calm about her that brings balance and strength to my existence. It is like I see everything different and new. I have shed my old demons and dark thoughts. I feel my life is now blessed with her in it.
But watching her up there on the high line, it makes me feel physically ill, even more than in the beginning. I hold my breath from fear until she is back on the ground safe and I know I can't live with this for ever, I am so scare for her. Scared to loose her.
Normally we keep to friendly talk, pleasantries, when we are in puplic. But she has just come out back after her act and I can't stop myself as I run over to her, almost yelling. "Do you know what you are doing Malina? You are risking your life up there every damn time. Tonight you slipped twice. You won't be this lucky forever". I stare at her. I had been close to crying watching her up there. This is the only thing we disagree about.
"Yeah I can Tom. My grandmother never fell. She died of old age". She snaps back.
"Well she is probably the only one then. I know that I have no right to come here and change you life and what you do, but I don't want you to die. I need you to stay alive for me, for us".
"I will babe, I will". She promises me, but it just don't make me feel better. I will be beside myself with worry and fear every time she gets up there.

*Malina*
"I need to go. My father and brother will get suspicious if I don't get out of here". I tell him. I don't want to have this discussion with him again. We have started talking about telling our families, but we both know there will be a reaction. Him being in my life and his resistance for the high line, my family will see that as a threat.
"I'll see you later then". He whispered softly. He looks around, we are all alone and he bends down to kiss me softly. Then he needs to go into the ring and I hurriedly leave.
As I catch up with my father and brother, my brother looks at me. "Were you talking to Tom all this time ? What is happening with the two of you ?"
"Nothing why ? He just wanted to ask me some things about the show". I don't want to tell them yet. I feel a loyalty towards Tom and a need to protect him.
"And what more ?" My brother is smiling at me. "You know you can tell me everything right ?" He says ingratiatingly. He often treat me like a child, even though he is only 4 years older than me.
"There is nothing to tell. He is a nice man. We are friends". I tell him, looking away.
"You know he is 36 years old almost 37 right ? He could almost be your father sis. I really hope you realise that". My beother says.
"Nothing is happening". I say cold. I don't like feeling pressured.
"Well but don't go around getting ideas because he looks handsome in a suit. He would throw you away as soon as he had gotten what he wanted and he is leaving soon anyways. I know his type. Some fancy actor thinking it fun to spend a couple of months in a circus, slumming it. He will be out of here soon, don't let him tell you anything else". My brother says. I know he wont be here for long, but for other reasons. He don't belong here, he is not made for this, even though he handles it fine. He deserves much better.
"Has he said anything to you ? Promised you anything ?" He asks, apparently my brother just wont stop this.
"Why should he ? We just talk a bit, mostly about the circus. He wants to know as much as possible for when he presents me". I say and my brother nods looking away.

*Andrei*
I am not sure I totally believe her. I have seen the way he looks at her, especially when she is up on the line. It is clear to see in his eye how he feels about my sister. But I am happy that she doesn't seem to have noticed. It would only bring her problems. But I know she is a good girl. She never looks at men and both me and our father is happy about that. There is a lot of easy women in the circus and I would never tolerate if my sister was one of them. I might get tempted by them once in a while without my wife knowing, but Malina is a girl, that is another story.
We have always been happy that the men in the circus didn't seem to catch her eyes. But I don't like this outsider. This actor that seems to do.
"You realise that he know nothing about circus and life in one right ?" I tell her. "He has no idea about your world".
"He is a decent and nice man. He is not like the men in circus, but I am starting to think that is a good thing". She says.

*Malina*
"I'm sure he will be a wonderful father and husband". I say very lowly to myself. Which is more than I can say about my brother. I know he sometimes hits his wife when he gets drunk. No one says anything, it isn't uncommon that the men in the circus threats their women badly. The women gets revenge by sleeping with other men. I never liked their morale and values or the games some people plays.
I have stuck to my work and taking care of my father. That is enough for me, or it had been, until Tom showed up. Now I wish for more in life and preferably with him. He is so much better, more of a man, than my father or brother, hell than any man here. He is a true gentleman and he is so good to me. I had never imagined I could be lucky enough to find a man like that. But my brother is probably right. Even though he makes me promises, he will leave soon and that will be without me. I could never fit into his normal life. I am just a circus girl, but I am grateful to be in his life right now. And I am enjoying our love every day I get.
"Just don't start getting ideas". My brother warns my as we reach my trailer. "Don't let a man like him ruin you".