Believe in Magic [a Loki fanfic]

Kindness

 "Thank you for treating me with so much kindness." 

Loki looked up from the book he was reading to meet Ella's eyes. 

"It would be the first time somebody calls me kind," he said with a bitter undertone in his voice. 

"What would you call it then?" she asked. Choosing not to answer right away, he pondered over it. Why was he spending time with her? Most likely because he was bored and she was somewhat intriguing. 

"Boredom. I am tired of sitting in the library by myself," he finally stated flatly. 

"I see," Ella chuckled softly, "Well, - thank you for being bored then." 

"Just stop doing this, will you?" Loki hissed. "Stop thanking me or I will regret having saved you." 

"Regret that you did not leave me to the hounds like you wanted to?" She asked rather innocently and Loki felt a tinge of conscience at her words, yet to his bemusement the girl smiled at him and continued to say, 

"Well, it is a little late for regrets now, isn't it?" 

"I guess so," the God growled and felt his annoyance fade. 

"How - do you know?" 

"That it is too late for regrets?" 

"No." He knitted his brow. "That I considered leaving you there." 

"It was not hard to figure that out, since it was your cursing that brought me back to consciousness." 

"Then you know what kind of person I am." His voice was cold now. "Still, you call me kind and are thanking me? Mortals, I will never understand them." 

Loki shook his head at her obvious stupidity in this matter, and his eyes returned to the pages in the book he had been engaged in.  Ella kept the smile on her face as she watched him. Even though she felt the bitterness of his words, he acted like a boy who was too proud to admit he had done something nice. 

"Well, you did not leave me there to die. And I was ready to die, Loki, I had surrendered to death. When your voice pulled me back, I realised that the person who had heart enough to save me turned out to be fighting his own battle. I was nothing but another burden for him. It gave me strength. I wanted to live, because I feared that I would never get a chance to thank you for your kindness. I wanted you to know that your efforts were at least appreciated even though they might have been wasted." Her words were spoken quietly like a whisper. 

"You may not be full of light, like your brother, but your heart is in the right place." 

When Loki lifted his gaze to hers his dark eyes pierced her like an arrow. 

"Do not speak of things you do not know. I am neither kind, nor am I a hero." 

His eyes were hard and cold now. Ella held his gaze. How could he have such hatred for himself? What had happened to him to let him be so hard on himself, to fear his own light the way he did? She knew it was his darkness that let her trust him and paradoxically made her feel comfortable around him, because he understood what it meant to suffer. He was right though, Ella felt she knew him, when she really did not. 

"You are right. I know nothing about you." When she put her attention back to the book in her hands, she sensed him relax. 

Eir had told her that Loki used to play pranks on people and was known for causing a lot of mischief. Ella wondered if his sense of humour was still hidden somewhere underneath all the hardened up pain and grief. A faint smile played around her lips when she teased him, 

"I promise I shall not thank you anymore -- not even for being bored, Lord Loki." 

The corners of Loki's mouth curled up ever so slightly. 

"I am glad we agree on that, Lady Ella."