Tempted (Antisepticeye x Reader)

16

Warmth entraps your body and you feel like you're floating. Everything is dark, but your surroundings enclose around you. They are soft.

You breathe steadily and slowly. Letting air flow into your lungs, then release it without a struggle.

You feel relaxed...

Your mind is fuzzy, like you can't get a grasp of where you are, but you know you're aware.

You suddenly feel a lump in your throat that sends you into a coughing fit.

Then you open your eyes to find that you are laying in your bed. Sheets are clean and warm, your head is sunken into the soft pillow, and Anti sits at your feet watching you with a vacant expression.

You start to feel rage fill your stomach, but just as you are about to say something, Anti starts with a calm, solemn tone.

"I told you. You can get sick from being caught in the rain for too long."

He hands you an unopened bottle of water, but you are hesitant to take it.

"Don't worry. I didn't do anything to it."

You sit up, surprised to see how easily you did and try to say something along the lines of 'why are you here,' or 'you better have an explanation that will rock the world because Anti you're a bastard,' but your voice is so scratchy and raw that you end up making some sort of strained sound.

"Don't try to talk. Just drink."

You then take the bottle from him and gulp down at least half of it.

"I need to explain some things to you, (y/n). So if you'd just let me talk, I'll be able to help you understand."

Understand what?

"Everything, I hope."

You don't say -or think- anything. You just nod after a moment, and he goes on after a long sigh.

"Okay. Let's start with the nightmares, because you probably have the most questions about them. I'll try to cut to the chase as much as possible. Just bare with me."

He shifts his weight a little on the bed. "There was a reason you experienced them. And that reason was because I needed you to get the tiniest glimpse of what I have gone through."

You make a confused face.

"In Jack's mind," Anti explains. He makes an expression as if he is deciding the best way to explain something. "As you know, everyone has nightmares, right? No one likes them, so they wonder why they feel fear in a strange fantasy of theirs."

"Well... It's me."

You are about to say something else, but he interrupts you, saving your voice. "Hang on. Let me explain. You know that common feeling in a nightmare where you can't do anything? Where no matter how hard you try, you can't scream? Or yell? Or even speak? Breathe? Walk? Anything! You can't do anything. In your case, it is the eagle pinning you against the tree, then flying you high into the air and letting you go. Well, that feeling or sensation is me. I am the feeling of helplessness."

"And when you were in the Jeep, being pushed out of the car door? You knew no one was in the car, and no one was there to be pushing you out, yet some invisible force crashed the car, and you could do nothing about it. The feeling of loss of control. That's me."