One second it's love.
The intense, fiery love.
The one that burns your stomach and
veers your mind in another direction.
Another second it's fear.
The fear of what will
And the fear of what won't.
The shooting feeling of panic when you accept your fate, the fate that you prayed would never come but soon enough it did.
Then the tired feeling.
When your brain hurts from all the hours of the night that you were up
creating false realities of what you'd hope to happen but never does.
Soon enough it's dread.
When you wake up and wonder if it would even matter if you got up or not.
When your breaths are getting shorter and it's as though you're withering away to nothingness, but you're unbothered by it.
And mostly it's the feeling of uncertainty.
The feeling that you can't explain.
You can't explain it because you can't identify the feeling yourself.
It's all the feelings combined yet none of them at all.
The lack of feeling.
