Stockholm syndrome (camren)

16.

Camila looked fearful. Not to say surprised. At Lauren's harsh but intelligent words she was awfully hurt, you know at what she said. It wasn't just the fact that camila was deeply in love with her. It was that she was her first time, her first one. the one she had first fell in love with. She had never fell in love before. It was crazy such a surreal feeling. The way she went in depth with her words cut so deep into her heart. It made her bleed like she had never bled or let a single drop of blood out of her body before. It hurt like if someone you loved and talked to every day and just left. Without a trace, you loved them so fucking deeply. That's how much it hurt. As camila went back into reality she saw Lauren just sit there in silence she was wondering what the other girl was thinking about.
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Lauren's pov.
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I watched her, wondering if I should follow through with this. I wasn't supposed to fall in love with her. I wasn't supposed to feel these bullshit feelings I had. I wasn't supposed to feel any of this. I was supposed to be the heartless one. The one who didn't feel anything at all. But I did and it truly hurt I had to follow through with this. What was I supposed to do? Just let her run away. Tell the police, only to put me in prison for years to have my life wasted, no that's not what I was gonna do. I was going to kill her. And I was going to have fun with it. I sat up and walked to the stairs. I then shuffled up them vastly eager to get this over with. I went into my weapon assortment. I got whatever felt right. I grabbed a knife, scalpel, and tweasers. Knowing I was probably only gonna use one. I walked down the stairs feeling sympathetic for the younger girl. I seen her at the bottom of the stairs looking lifeless. Like she wasn't even here. I knew she was absorbed in her own thoughts and I had to bring her out. So I just said sorry. Knowing that's what I felt, I felt sorry genuinely. It hurt that I had to do this. I walked up to her and I put on 2 of the latex gloves that were beside me she looked at me in fear. The fear that I wanted, I wanted it but from someone else. She wasn't the one. I didn't want to kill her. But I really had to at this point and it pains me to say that I wanted more time with her I really did. I grabbed the knife and I lifted her arm up I positioned the knife some type of way in my hand and I cut. I cut so deep that the blood gushed out straight away but this time it felt different. I didn't get the rush I usually did. It made me sick to my stomach I carved a heart into her arm. Not even knowing that I did. She winced in pain. I could tell that it hurt her so much though I had to continue....