Take It Back, My Friend (Ronnie Radke)

The Makeup

"Can I get you anything to drink?" I asked as I kicked my shoes off and walked into the kichen throwing my purse and keys on the table. "Sorry it's kind of messy in here. We can sit in the living room." 

"I'm okay." He made his way back towards the front of the house and sat on one of the couches. I bee-lined for the cabinet to get a wine glass and pulled out a very large bottle of white wine and poured myself a glass. I tell people I'm not a big drinker but I'm a wineo. I can drink wine with anything. 

I walked back into the living room to see him standing by the wall with a bunch of photos hung. He saw me walked in and pointed to a photo. 

"When was this?" I walked over to see the photo he was looking at was one of me in a big harness and goggles. 

"I went skydiving last year." 

"You? You went skydiving. Huh." He continued to look over all the photos. I knew he was going to make a comment about the photo I have of Max and I on the wall as soon as I saw his eyes move towards it. 

"This looks old." He was staring at it. 

"Yeah it was two years ago maybe." I said.

"You look different. Younger, I guess." He was still staring at it. 

"That's usually what happens when you get older." I mumbled. 

He eventually looked away and continued to look at the array of photos framed. He stopped on one of my mom and I. 

"This is a nice picture."

"Thanks" I mumbled taking a sip of wine. I made my way to the couch a tucked my leg under me and sat down. He after a few seconds walked over and sat at the other end. I was facing him with my arm and wine resting on the top of the couch. 

"Now you can yell at me all you want." I told him. 

"I don't want to yell at you." He sighed. "I guess I should start off with apologizing."

"That would be good." I don't know where my attitude came from but I was just so ticked off at this. I think I was just mad at the whole situation. 

"So, I'm sorry for everything I have done and said to you. Soph, you were there from day one and I can't say that about anyone. You loved me with all you had and it took me a while but I recognize that now. I don't think anything will be able to make up for all that I've done to you." 

I stared at him for a while and took a sip of wine. "Apology accepted." I said before I even knew what I was saying. I continued to sip on my wine and before I knew it the glass was empty. I stood up to get more offering him some but he turned it down. 

"I'm not really drinking anymore." 

"That's nice to hear, actually. I'm glad you got your act together." I somewhat shouted from the kitchen. I decided to save myself some trips and just bought the oversized bottle back into the living room with me and poured myself a new glass. 

"I see you still drink like a fish" He laughed. 

"I only drink wine and it's basically grape juice so it hardly counts." I reasoned. There was still some tension in the room. 

"Tell me about your band." I was genuinely curious. When I said I kept up with Ronnie's life I really meant Ronnie. I didn't really know anything about his bands other than I thought one of the songs on their album was about me. 

"It's me and a few other dudes. Nasty and I kind of started it but he fell out. We just got a new guitarist from overseas. Dude can play guitar like no other." He was smiling. 

"I'm glad your album is doing well." I said. 

"Have you heard it?" He perked up and sat up a little more. 

"Yeah. I hope you take zero offense to this but I think it's a thousand times better than your older stuff." I didn't want to bring the past up and potentially pour salt in the wound. 

"Really? You think?"  I nodded. It was true. Not that I didn't like their old band but this was just better. "Wow, that's awesome." He was still smiling. 

We talked for who knows how long and he was surprised to find out that I had listened to their album and knew all the songs on it. I finally got the courage to ask about the song that I was sure was about me. 

"Did you write a song with me in mind?" 

It almost looked like he paled a bit. "How'd you know?" 

"I just had a feeling. It's a catchy song though." 

"I thought about calling you a lot and then I was still so mad and it all just kinda came together."

What was he talking about, calling me? "Wait, what's the song called again?" I asked because I was beyond confused. 

"Pick up the phone." Wait.

"Who's Caught Like a Fly about then?" 

"You thought that was about you?" He looked almost insulted. 

"I assumed!" I just about shouted it in his face. Wait, now I have to hear this again. I got up and fished phone out of my purse. I was pulling up YouTube as I walked back in and found a fan made lyric video. I sat back down on the couch grabbing my wine and turning the phone so I could watch it. I felt Ronnie scoot over and suddenly he was leaning over my shoulder watching too. At some point he pointed out how the lyrics were wrong in the video and it may have been the several glasses of wine but I laughed. 

"This is a very violent song." I commented over his vocals coming from my phone. 

"Yeah, I wasn't in the greatest of places mentally." 

We had lost track of time and I didn't really notice until I realized I was starving and pretty buzzed. 

"Are you hungry?" I asked him but then I realized the time and he probably has a lot better places to be than here. "Or you can leave if you need to, don't feel like you have to stay or anything." 

"I want to stay. Let's eat." 

I smiled at him. The more time together the less awkward it felt. He still had a lot of the same mannerisms. IT was definitely the wine doing it but I grabbed his bicep and said "Let's see if we can find something to eat in my pathetic excuse for a kitchen." He laughed. 

"I'll take anything you've got."

"You might want to take that back" I said as I opened the half empty fridge. I haven't gone grocery shopping in forever. Then I got the wonderful idea, what if I just went shopping now.

"What are you hungry for?" I asked him leaning against a counter. Before he could even say anything I asked if we wanted pasta. He laughed a little and agreed. 

"Cool, well I don't have any so we have to go to the store." Saying 'we' just sounded so right. It was almost like nothing changed. Almost.