My Heart Is Yours

Chapter 110

Upon their return back to work, they finally announced to their team that they were engaged. Martin cried and suddenly hugged them both with the rest of the crew following suit. Congratulations were said all around and the girls were coaxing Maine to show them the ring with Maine reluctantly relenting. Richard had multiple pats on the back and shoulder by his co-pilots and the male FAs, congratulating him.

It was business as usual afterwards. But Martin noticed Richard's lingering stare every so often during their briefing and Maine's blush like she knew he was looking, even when her back was turned to him. Martin could only shake his head. But that was the only difference that he noticed. The couple kept their work ethic despite Martin being lenient with them.

They arrived at Barcelona-El Prat Airport early evening. The group only got a chance to freshen up in their rooms before they went out once more for dinner. The conversations focused around the couple, grilling them for information of their engagement. Richard and Maine tagged teamed on their answers, making sure that they gave as much info as they can without giving away too much.

"So," Anne said. "Will we be expecting little Maines and Jasons anytime soon?"

"We're not in a hurry," Richard answered simply. But there was a haunted look on his face that only Maine noticed. She reached out to take his hand and gave it a squeeze. She felt him squeeze back, but not as tightly as hers.

When they called it a night, the group went about their separate ways with some of them wanting to experience the night life Barcelona had to offer. Maine and Richard went up to their hotel room, deciding not to join them, as Richard promised her a tour of the city the next day.

-oo-

Richard was reading on his side of the bed when Maine came out from her shower.

"Your med's on the table," he muttered, never taking his eyes off the book.

Maine just smiled and took them. She then slowly climb up the bed and sat cross legged beside him but was half a foot away.

"Home?"

"Hmm?"

"I want to talk about it."

"About what?"

"I want to be off the pills once we're married."

She saw Richard heaved a sigh and placed a bookmark on the page he was reading, then set the book aside.

He looked at her and started, "Maine..."

"I want to have kids, RJ," she said.

"I want kids too, Heart," he replied. "But we're not in a hurry."

"The look on your face when we first met Teena tells a different story," she said.

"We could still have kids without you getting off the pills," he stated.

"Surrogacy?"

"No," Richard remarked. "Nothing against couples who get surrogates but I am really not comfortable holding another woman's tummy just because our kid's in her. I was thinking more of adoption."

Maine sighed and said, "Home, I want to get pregnant and experience the whole thing."

Richard shook his head and said, "it's too much of a risk. You heard what Doc Burnz said."

"He also said it's possible," she countered. "We would just need to take extra precautions but I can get pregnant and deliver safely. I'm not even going to argue about the delivery. I'll get a C-Section."

"As if I care about you getting another scar," Richard scoffed. "Maine, you'll be off the steroids when you get pregnant. We haven't even gotten your levels back to normal yet."

"Doc Burnz already gave different alternatives for that," she answered. "Besides, he said so himself. Three more sessions then I'm back to normal."

Richard shook his head once more and replied in a voice devoid of any emotion, "it's still much too big of a risk, my Heart."

Maine sighed. She knew he was angry. But she didn't want to relent either. She knew the risk involved when she decided that she wanted to get pregnant. She'd been doing research when she saw how attached Richard had become with Teena months ago. She knew he wanted kids as much as she did. But she would need to make him agree to her terms. She wasn't against adoption. But she just wanted to give him at least one child. One reminder of how much she loves him. A gift of life for the gift of life that was given to her as well.

With renewed determination, she tried a different approach.

She slowly crawled towards him and sat on his lap. He didn't stop her and even wrapped his arms around her when she snuggled closer. She heard him sigh.

"You're not playing fair," Richard muttered as he felt her lips on his neck.

"Please," she started. "Just hear me out. I'll be extra careful. If I have to resign from work, I will. If Doc Burnz says that I need bedrest, I'll do it. No questions asked. We'll live with our parents during the whole pregnancy or we'll get ate Vangie to stay with us for the whole duration. Just please. Please, agree to this."

She tightened her hold on him emphasizing her point. He returned her embrace but leaned his head back on the headboard. He shook his head and muttered, "I can't lose you, Maine."

"You won't," she replied. "We'll make sure of it. We've been doing so well with the maintenance. I'm sure we'll be able to do this too. Home, please? At least say that you'll think about it."

Richard gave another audible sigh but kept silent. His grip on Maine tightened which worried her somewhat. They stayed in that position for a few more moments before Richard broke the silence.

"What if I told you I would agree to it if you would also agree to something I want?" He asked.

"What is it first?"

"If there's a complication," he said. "However minor it would be. No questions asked, we'll terminate."

"What?"

"We'll terminate the pregnancy," he stated. His look still devoid of any emotion as Maine gawked at him. He continued, "you're life is more important. If something went wrong. Any kind of complication that would risk your life. We'll terminate the pregnancy immediately."

"I can't agree to that, RJ," Maine shook her head in disbelief. She shed a tear then, "please see my point in this. This is more for you than it is for me. I know how much you love kids. Wouldn't it be great if we have kids of our own from the both of us? I can't believe you would even suggest it."

"Call me evil, a dick, a selfish bastard or even the devil incarnate with my suggestion," he said as he tried to brush her tears but Maine swatted the hand away. "But you also need to see my point in this. I've only just started picking up the pieces since Rich died. I can't lose you, Maine. I just can't. Don't you understand? Losing you would destroy me! I won't be able to move forward after that. How could I take care of our kid if I'm nothing but a shell?"

"But terminating?"

"I can't lose you," he said simply. The coldness of his voice returned.

They were silent for some time as Maine cried but she still rested her head on his chest. When the tears subsided, Richard suddenly heard her sigh and noticed her rubbing her chest near her heart.

"Maine?"

"My heart feels heavy," she stated. "We never had this type of disagreement before."

"Do you want me to leave?"

"No," she replied, clutching him tightly to emphasize her point. "I don't want to be alone. Besides, where would you go?"

"I could bunk with Martin," he said. "And I could ask one of the girls to join you."

"No," she replied. "I want you here. I mean, I get your point. I do. I just couldn't believe you would even suggest it."

"I never claimed to be a saint, Maine."

"I just can't accept it."

"Then," he sighed. "We're at an impasse."