Quentin's Way

Chapter 15

            My grandma died later in the afternoon on that same sunny Friday, hours after I'd found her unconscious on the kitchen floor. It was October 21, the day before my nineteenth birthday. The doctor explained everything to me and I knew once I held her hand and she didn't squeeze back that she was already gone. When the doctor and nurses let me have private time with her, I spent over an hour telling her everything that I could think of; from childhood memories to current things that had been going on in my life. I even told her about my love for Demi. When I couldn't think of anything else to tell her, I simply told her I loved her and I thanked her for every single thing she'd ever done for me. I stayed strong as the nurses turned off the machines. It wasn't until I was out of the room and down the hall that I finally allowed myself to cry.

            "What do you mean I can't talk to him?" I asked a Greensville Correctional Center receptionist over the phone as I sat in my car. "Did you not hear what I just said? His mama, my grandma, just died."

            "Sir, you'll need to schedule a visit," she said back with an attitude. "We don't allow inmates to use the office phones."

            "Can you tell him to call me? I can give you my number."

            "I can't do that either. The only way you can talk to him is if you schedule a visit."

            "Okay, can I come there today then?"

            "No, this week is an off week. The earliest you'd be able to come for a visit is..." She took a while meaning she was probably checking for the date. "...next Thursday."

            "I can't wait until then."

            "I'm sorry, but..."

            "Listen, both my uncles are dead. My grandma's only sister is dead and she never married or had kids. I have no way of gettin' in touch with my uncles' kids because I haven't seen them since I was little. I am my dad's only kid and his mama just died today. He needs to know that she passed away. I haven't talked to him in so long but I have to tell him. If it was my mama..." I got choked up but managed to complete what I needed to say, "If it was my mama, I'd want to know. You people already got him locked up for life. The least you can do is let me see him for a few minutes to tell him that his mama passed away."

            She was silent for a little while before asking, "What did you say your father's full name was again?"

            "Curtis Lamar Williams."

            "And your full name is?"

            "Quentin Tariq Williams."

            "Okay, Quentin. I will forward your request to the warden and if he grants a special visit, we will contact you at the number you made this phone call from."

            "Thank you." I ended the call and placed my phone in my pocket before starting up my car and driving out of the hospital parking lot.

            When I got back home, I cleaned up the kitchen and then took a shower. I was somehow holding myself together and in the moment, it didn't feel like I was bottling anything up or repressing my feelings. I was upset but not as upset as I was back at the hospital. I remember when my mama got institutionalized because of her severe paranoid schizophrenia. I'd learned how to cope with her being institutionalized. I'd learned how to cope with my dad being locked up for the rest of his life. This situation was different. Even though I had no intention on visiting my parents, I could visit them because they're alive. My grandma was gone forever. I'd never see her smile or hear her voice ever again. How was I going to cope with that?