One More Time

Part 19

Lindsey left the house the following morning, thinking Stevie was still sound asleep. But she wasn't. She had barely slept during the night, she was so anxious. She kept repeating it to herself that everything was going to be fine. If she were completely honest, she wasn't nervous about Lindsey bringing home Eric for the reasons she had been worried before. Now she couldn't stop wondering if she was capable of being a good mother at all. What made a woman a good mother? Unconditional love - the first thing that came to her mind. Her mouth got dry, she was going to try.

Stevie had some time before Lindsey would return. Getting out of bed, she went to the bathroom, deciding to have a nice bath, hoping it would relax her. Since it was morning, she didn't light up any incense or candles, but the stillness of the moment did bring her a feeling of peace and calm. Stevie didn't feel like eating, so she skipped breakfast, sitting down at the kitchen table for a cup of coffee only. The clock on the wall was ticking so loudly, she couldn't stand it. Bringing her empty cup to the sink, she washed it and put it back in its place. 

Letting out a heavy breath, Stevie took unsure steps from the kitchen towards the stairs. She hadn't been there, not once. Lindsey certainly had visited the room in particular frequently. She was curious, it was his project completely. Closing her fingers around the handle, she held onto it for a moment, before opening the door to the nursery. She was surrounded by shades of blue as she took in the decor. Lindsey had painted the walls himself, she heard him putting together the crib as well as the changing table. She noticed at least ten different stuffed toys in the crib and she picked up one, smiling weakly. Turning the other way, Stevie noticed a huge, definitely as tall as herself, bunny. It startled her at first, but she couldn't help but laugh at it, shaking her head slightly, imagining Lindsey with it. There was a white rocking chair in one corner, she walked over to it and sat down, seeing the whole room. Lindsey had done a great job. There wasn't much she'd want to change, not that she was going to. 

Without realizing it, Stevie had spent quite a while in the nursery. Lindsey's voice brought her back and she opened her eyes. Her heart momentarily stopped, seeing him with a baby in his arms. Yes, she wanted to be the one to give him a child, but even if it hadn't happened for them, she was happy. At that exact moment she was so very happy for him. It suited him, being a father. 

Walking over to her slowly, Lindsey then stopped in front of Stevie, silently asking her a question, without words. It had been some time since she held a baby, but she lifted her arms into position and Lindsey smiled, giving Eric to her.

"Well, hey there." Stevie spoke up, looking down at the baby, who was staring up at her. "I've heard a lot about you." Lindsey chuckled a little, sitting down on the shag carpet in the middle of the room.

Stevie couldn't believe herself. She wasn't going to be able to love the boy as her own? Well, she proved herself wrong. Her heartbeat picked up pace and tears brimmed her eyes. She held that innocent baby boy, smiling at him, and she realized she couldn't wait for him to call her Mom. 

"You're beautiful, Steph. You look wonderful with a baby in your arms." Lindsey said after a while.

"Funny, I was going to say how handsome you look, holding him." She replied, her throat tight. She felt as if she was going to start crying any moment. "Thank you."

"What are you thanking me for, sweetheart?" Lindsey asked, half-smiling at her.

"For..." She paused to compose herself. "For making me a mother."

"Oh, baby..." Lindsey got back up on his feet and approached her, standing behind her he placed his palms on her shoulders. "I'm only repeating myself, but you're the only one I've ever wanted to have kids with. We might have become parents not the most traditional way, but it doesn't change the fact that we are Eric's parents."

"How did you pick that name?" Stevie asked, the back of her fingers softly brushing against the baby's cheek.

"I don't know to be honest. I just liked it. It was the first name I thought of, when I saw him." 

"It fits. He looks like Eric."

"You think so? He's not used to it yet, we could still change." Lindsey only half-joked, a part of him still thought he should have talked it over with Stevie. 

"Relax, Linds." She tilted her chin up and placed her hand over his. "I love the name. And I love you." Her eyes then focused on Eric's perfect little angelic face. "And I love you, too."