Mania

Lesson 15. Intent

The kiss was patient, slow, as if he had all the time in the world, one hand cupping the back of her neck, the other resting lightly on her thigh.

Clemence responded unsurely, her head felt airy, her hands stayed at her side, she lost her bearings for a few seconds, just a for a few seconds, she was only aware of the heat of his skin and the smell and the taste and the pressure of his touch and it filled her senses to the brim.

Until she felt the leather seat under her fingertips, the chill of the night air, her arm brushing against the hard edge of the car door and she suddenly became aware again, aware that she was in her teacher's car outside her house, kissing him in the dark. 

She hesitated. 

She broke away.

She blinked quickly, his face still close, his dark eyes heavily lidded, his mouth parted slightly. Clemence stared at the crook on his nose before she leant back, created space.

'This is wrong.' Her voice was a soft breath.

'Why?' He asked, his eyes firm.  'Tell me why it's wrong.'

Clemence blinked. 'How can it not be?'

'But why?'

'Because.' She looked at him, shaking her head. 'You're my teacher.'

An almost smile pulled at his lips. 'I am a teacher yes. And you happen to be in one of my classes. But that won't last forever. That's not all i am, that's not all you are, not just a student. You're a grown woman who can make her own choices. And I can certainly make mine.' His voice was low, steady, the accent stronger in the quiet vacuum of the car.

She shifted under his heavy gaze. 'But how can this....' Clemence trailed off, unable to grasp the whirlwind of words in her brain and unable to convey what she was thinking. 'You don't even know me.' She settled with.

This time the smile was there, the corner of his mouth, a slightly crinkle in his eyes. 'You really think that?'

'I don't even know you.' She put emphasis on the last word, locking eyes, not shrinking away from his unwavering eyes.

'Then get to know me.' He replied indifferently, as if it was that simple.

She looked at him, unsure, building up a rebuttal before he spoke again.

'Monday. Do you have classes in the morning?'

'Uh, no, you're class is my only one of the day.' She mumbled, confused.

He nodded. 'Come to office, at least an hour before our lecture.'

'But your office hours aren't-'

'Clemence.' He sighed softly, cutting her off, amusement lacing his words. 'I'm hardly at this point going to demand you still use my office hours.'

'Well you are my teacher.' She retorted, not wanting any part of him to be patronising or for him to be treating her as naive. Like he had said, she was a grown woman. She knew what she was doing.

'Hm.' His lip was curling as he raised an eyebrow at her. 'Can you wake up in time to be there?'

She sighed. 'That's getting old now. Yes i can but i don't understand what for.'

'Like i said, you should get to know me.' His usual stern expression was alive with amusement as he watched her unsure face, the furrow of an eyebrow and slight narrowing of the eyes in confusion, the downturned lips.

She didn't know him, not really, she knew nothing about him on a personal level and she couldn't understand why she already felt she was in so deep. How could she feel this magnetism to someone she barely knew.