I'm still here - Hannah and clay fanfic-

Chapter 5

"Hey Hannah." Clay says as he sits down. "Hey Clay." I say and then I smile at him.

I take a sip of my hot chocolate and we just have an awkward silence. "So what do you wanna talk about?" Clay says.

"Anything really." I say and then I take another sip.
Clay smiles at me. "Well do you know what happened with Tyler he looked a little down?" I look at him and then I look down at the floor.
"I don't know, everyone's been a little down lately." I said. Clay nodded his head and then we were back to that awkward silence.

"Um I gotta go, But I'll see you tomorrow?" I say as I get up. Clay smiles at me "Yea sure." He says. I grab my bookbag and then I leave. I walk to Courtney's house and I leave the tapes there.

Days passed and I was still passing on the tapes and all I heard were more fake apologies and no real ones. I think to myself sometimes why didn't I just die quickly enough.  It was Sheri's turn for the tape and just thinking about after Sheri's tape I would have to give it to clay.

I take it to Sheri's house and I leave it there. I walk back home and I see my mom cooking dinner in the kitchen. "Hey Hannah." She says smiling at me.
"Hey mom." I say smiling back at her.

The doorbell rings, "I'll go get that." I say as I take off my bookbag. I open the door and I see Sheri standing with the box of tapes, she listened to it that quick.

I close the door behind me as I go outside. "What the hell hannah don't give this to me." Sheri says scared. I look at her confused. "How do you know what's in it?" Sheri gives me the box.

"Jessica told me what it is and I already know what's in here about me. I didn't do anything wrong." Sheri says. I look at her and I get angry, "What the hell do you mean. You killed Jeff this was your crime and you're lucky I didn't run to the cops and tell them you did it." I say angrily. Sheri scoffs "fuck you hannah I know that I didn't do it I'm innocent." Sheri turns around and she gets in her car and leaves.

Well great now I have to give the tapes to clay and I was not ready, I love clay so much and I don't know if he'll hate me after hearing his tape. I was about to walk in until I see clay walking up to me. "Hannah hey." He says.

"Oh hey clay." I say smiling at him. Clay comes up to me.

"So you wanna hang out?" He says. My heart starts to beat fast, "sorry I can't I have to work on a project." I say to him.

"Oh okay well I'll see you tomorrow." He says, clay waves goodbye and he walks away. I walk inside and my eyes start to tear up. I run to my room and I just break down. I look at the box of tapes and just throw them against my wall. The tapes fall everywhere and I sit on the floor crying. My mom comes in the room and she sees me crying.

"Hannah what's wrong?" She says with a worried look on her face. I look at her "I'm going to lose the best thing that ever happened to me." I start to cry more, my mom bends and picks up a tape.

"Take a shower, get something to eat and rest a little okay honey." My mom says. I nod at her and then she comes close to me and gives me a hug.

I take a shower and I eat dinner and then I sleep for a little. I wake up to sound of my parents talking. I slowly walk into the living and I see my parents talking and the tapes were on the table.

"Hannah what the hell was that?" My Dad says. Tears start to come down my face and I didn't know what to say. "Well answer me?" He says. I look down and then I look back up at them. "They were tapes that I've had left for the people that hurt me." I say crying.

"You've been raped and you didn't come to me or your father!" My mom says crying. Tears start to fully come down. "Mom I tried to get help but he couldn't help me." I say crying. My mom gets up and grabs the phone. "Hannah you didn't tell us that there was someone taking pictures of you." My Dad says angry.

"Mom what are you doing." I say. She looks at me and she dials a number. "I'm calling the cops." She says holding the phone up to her ear. "No mom put the phone down." I say trying to stop her.

She looks at me and then the phone answers "yes hello I'm Olivia baker and I have found a box of tapes that my daughter has made and there's a lot that you need to listen too." She says shaking. "Okay thank you so much." My mom hangs up and looks at me and my dad.

"The cops are on their way to listen." She says.
I go to my room and I grab a piece a notebook and I grab a pen, when my parents aren't looking I take tape number 11, put on my sweater and shoes. My mom looks at me.

"Where are you going?" My mom says. I look at her as I head for the door. "I'm going to a friends house." I open the door and I leave.

I start to walk down the dark street and I start to think about how clay will react to this tape, why am I giving it to him? I don't know I just want him to hear this and as much as it scares me on how he'll feel. The guilt will just fly away from my body.

I finally get to his house and I go up on his porch steps and write something on a piece of paper. I rip out the paper and fold it and then put it inside the tape case. I set it down and then I walk away.