My love for the Pharaoh

Chapter 25

Jumoke climbed in.

"What do you need to talk to me about Femi?" He asked.

"It's just. I feel so lost. You know who and what you are. I don't. I need answers. No one seems to be able to give them to me and that's all I want. Who am I Jumoke? Please tell me." I pleaded.

"I wish I could. Femi it is not up to me. Pane asked me not to. He wants to talk to you. When he is better obviously. You just have to wait." Jumoke said. He kept so calm yet he looked so sad.

"What has Pane got to do with it?" I asked. I need answers. Pane has nothing to do with me. Does he?

"He has a lot to do with it. I can't tell you Femi. I want to, I really want to but, it's not my place. I love you Femi but, I just can't." He said bowing his head. I could see this was affecting him.

"Jumoke don't worry. I will talk to Pane when he is well again. That should be soon." I said try to keep positive.

"Femi it is not that easy. You have to wait. There is a reason. I know it's hard but, be patient." He reassured me.

"Is it to do with that legend thing. Bethany let it slip." I asked I shouldn't of said that. I let things slip to easily.

"She was told not to. I knew she would. Damn it why does someone have to ruin it. I guess I am going to have to tell you now. Yes it is to do with that legend. That legend is what we have been waiting for. It is our people's chance to get some rights to be free. Femi you are a big part of our future." He spat but, struggled with the last part.

"No don't go ahead. I'll wait." I said, I knew it was the best thing to do. This was hurting Jumoke.

"I will go through with it now I have started." He replied, he was putting up a fight even though it was hurting him.

"NO!" I snapped I didn't mean to. "It's hurting you Jumoke I won't let you do it."

"Come on. I need to finish now. Just let me Femi. It may bring some closure or push me back." He said.

"Go on then but, don't blame me if it pushes you back. I don't know what you are on about pushing you back."

"I will tell you. It all began around fifteen years ago. That's when I met Pane, he told me all about they legend. I told him about you. He thought you could be it the one. I thought he was wrong and couldn't cope with what your future maybe. I was hopelessly in love with you. That is why I got the help. I became upset. That is the reason we lost the war. If we didn't then your end would have come sooner. This way I can insure your saftey for a little longer." He said, unable to look at me.

"This is absurd. You gave up that Kingdom for me. Why? Why am I more important than your Kingdom?" I asked.

"Well because, you are the one who will help us succed when we go to war with my old Kingdom. You are our strength our secret weapon. If you were not her lots of innocent people will die because of who they are."

"But, what if I don't want to chose that path. All I want is just to be free."

"I know Femi however, this war will garrente our freedom if you are there and we win. Femi, you are one of us. They will kill you or try and kill you. This is also, your chance of freedom to." He said turning towards me and looking me straight in the eyes.

"You mean I am like Pane, Rosie, Bethany. What about you?" He never told me about himself so, I better ask.

"I am the same. Femi, your parents were part of us but, they died. The people that you live with who brought you up as one of their own are not your true family. They took you in after they died this is why you never knew. This is why it has been a secret to you. As soon as I saw you after I found out I wanted to tell you but, Pane told me not to. He said, and I quote "She is to young. We need to find out more first. Jumoke listen to me she is our only hope and we can't scare her away." I knew it would go wrong. As you can tell I stuck to his word." I never knew so much could be said about me. My family, my parents are dead. Did I have any other brothers and sisters. Where did they go? Who are they with?

"Jumoke" I said.

"hmm" he replied.

"Do I have any other family? Brothers, sisters, cousis, aunts, uncles?" Where is the harm in trying.

"I believe that you had two sisters and three brothers. You see, you were all sepreated. That is why Pane wanted to tell you as he knows where they are." He said. So my family are out there. I just want to meet them.

We carried on in silence. Nothing to really talk about. We didn't do much just sit and stare at the tarpaulin. I didn't have much to say really. These people all have this expectation of me which I can't fulfil. Who do they think I am? I don't even know myself any more that's the worrying thing.

"Femi you have been really quiet, what's the matter?" He asked. Shouldn't he know? He was the one who told me. Doesn't he realise what he just told me!

"So you don't know what we talked about? Wouldn't you be slightly annoyed or confused at why this had been hidden hidden for so many years. Years I had wasted being someone I am not!"

"Hey hey hey you asked I told. Don't get angry at me. I told you to wait for Pane to explain however, you thought you could take it. You were wrong, I knew it! I knew you could never be strong enough to take it." He kept tormenting me. I had never seen him like that before.

"Well you should of stronger and held out." I snapped back. I could never wanted to hurt him especially after everything he has been through.

"I should of held out! I have done my share of holding and and being strong! You saw what they did." His voice began to break. I moved my eyes to look at him. A few tears trickled down his face. Guilt stabbed me in the stomach. How could I say such a thing? What is wrong with me?

"Jumoke. I am sorry. I didn't mean it you know. Your my world I could never hurt you I purpose. It was just a come back." I didn't know what else to say.

"Okay." He turned away and curled up in a ball. Guilts still surging through me. I kept trying to speak but, nothing absolutely nothing came out. All I could do was sit there. Sit there in tension. There was nothing I could do to cut it. Unless. I slowly moved towards him. And sat behind him. I kissed his crown of his head, then to the right, then to the left. With each kiss I placed in his head I said sorry. I kept going over and over in the same pattern. He never moved and never did anything. It worried me. So after a while I stopped and put my arms around him from behind. He moved his head towards my hands and kissed them.