" LIPSTICK " + STENBROUGH

[14]

a/n: you're lowkey welcome ;)

"billiam, as much as i love spending time with you, what is so urgent that you called me to your house at nine am on a saturday?"

beverly marsh lays on her stomach on bill denbrough's bed, ankles crossed and feet in the air. the boy in question is pacing his room, anxiety written across his features.

"i-i-i nuh-nuh-need t-to talk t-to y-y-you." bill's stutter is heavy, and the expression on beverly's face tells bill she understands the severity. she sits up, eyebrows furrowed, legs crossed.

"what's wrong?"

"i-i fuh-feel l-l-l-like i chuh-cheated on y-you," bill says.

"you cheated on me?"

"nuh-no!" bill says. "i-i-i juh-just, fuh-feel l-l-like i did."

"what?" bill takes a deep breath.

it's been three days since bill's small birthday party, three days since he couldn't stop thinking about kissing stanley uris. the feeling of butterflies in his stomach, the flips it does whenever he thinks about stanley, the way his heart beats faster when he sees him in the hallway at school are nothing like how beverly marsh makes him feel.

but bill denbrough isn't gay. he can't be, right?

"i-i thi-think w-we should buh-buh-buh-break uh-up," bill says. beverly frowns. "i-i-i like suh-suh-some e-e-else."

"oh." the look on beverly's face crushes bill. "who?"

"i-i-i can't tuh-tuh-tell you," he stutters, and she gives him a look.

"bill, we've been going out for months and you won't tell me the girl you want to replace me with?" it's just like that that bill feels guilt cut open his heart. he feels so bad for breaking up with beverly, but he just doesn't like her.

"i–" how does he tell the girl he's been spending his weekends kissing and saying he loves that it's all been a lie? better yet, has it been? bill does mean it when he says he loves beverly marsh. she's impossible not to love, really, but maybe it just isn't like that. maybe he doesn't love beverly marsh romantically, but platonically.

"hello? bill?" she waves a hand in front of his face. he blinks, zoning back into reality.

"i-i-i thuh-think i-i'm guh-guh-guh-gay," bill's stutter is heavy, as it is when he's most anxious. and right now, he's never felt more anxiety. he stands in his bedroom, a towering sixteen-year-old in cuffed jeans and a ringer tee, telling a gorgeous girl who undoubtedly can have whoever she wants but chooses him regardless that he might be gay. why wouldn't he be anxious?

"oh." beverly's mouth forms an 'o' shape, and her eyebrows knit together. "so, the crush is a boy?" bill nods. beverly then nods herself. "that's cool."

"whuh-what?"

"i think it's cool, that you're figuring stuff out. and i respect your sexuality, bill." bill smiles. it's soft, and he goes to hug beverly. it's one of those hugs that says everything without saying anything. he fingers grip her t-shirt softly, face buried in her shoulder. beverly's chin sits on his shoulder, the rings on her finger tapping against his back gently.

"who is it?" beverly asks when they pull apart.

"i-i can't say," bill says. beverly raises an eyebrow, smirking.

"oh, really?" beverly asks. she's grinning. "that means i know who it is, doesn't it? otherwise you totally would tell me."

"i-i-i–"

"i knew it!"

beverly continues to ramble on and on about who it could possibly be, but her list never includes stanley uris. it never includes the boy who is slowly stealing bill's heart, with no warning at all.

the boy who makes him feel the way he feels when he first put on his mother's red lipstick.

——

i hope you guys are ready for some stenbRough soon this story is going to pick up soon okay cool

- m