Introspection

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I live in a house
with four walls.
Small, windowless,
only concrete;
to protect,
to hide,
what is left of my heart.

It is not much,
it is scratched
and trampled over
and tired and exhausted
of beating,
of making me live.

The walls too,
are hurt,
full of cracks
selfish people make,
sometimes,
even without noticing.

I tried to keep my walls together.
But the tape 
and bandaids
would not keep
the cold material
together, solid.

I tried to keep my heart together,
But the stitches 
did not turn out
either straight or even,
and any time now
it will fall apart again.

If my heart falls apart
and my walls break down,
what am I?
Is it worth it to exist like that?
Naked, hurt, ignored,
a ghost, a shell
of what I was,
of what I was wrong to have.

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