Hymns of Struggle

5- The Scientist

"For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known." -  1 Corinthians 13:12

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"I don't- I-...I don't think I understand."

The two of them hadn't left the room of sacrament for what must have been hours. Her spine ached, and she could feel her wrists starting to rub raw against the rope. It was only now she decided- no, she had decided long ago. It was only now that she had the gall to speak since her last, futile attempt. She had apologized and then, nothing. They only watched...watched everything she did. Everything. Either the delirium of fear or an eventual acceptance of the nonsensical had her questioning if the cartoon face was hiding eyes or if it was seeing all along. The hosting body shifted occasionally, but she was always the focal point; it had never wavered this whole time. There was an established tempo where they lifted their hands or arms in front of them with a faint murmur; the gap between them seemed to place her in a frame.

The sight of this being, the unavoidable truth they represented, was cognitively impossible.

It overwhelmed her mind and body, at first commanding her to cry- still did off and on- but eventually she dwelled into a sense of final bravery, that she was going to die here anyway. May as well die without so many questions.

Vulnerability. She had never felt so defenseless, out of control by stating a fact. She did not understand, and could not without the help of the very thing that plagued her and cleanly skinned the comfort she had in her reality. Calling upon the face of insanity was her only option.

After that, a heavy, unnatural silence swarmed the air, muting her will to try again.

"What do you mean?"

So sudden that it knocked her voice back to life with a gasp. It was a subdued, icy sound they made. Gentle by nature and yet with no intent of kindness nor comfort, even for someone dwelling her misery. As quiet as things were, its whisper sliced to the soul.

"I- I mean...." What did she mean? "I..."

They tilted their neck. The calm amid this flurry of horror had allowed opportunity to ponder her situation for the first time since the floorboards fell beneath her. The thing...they were covered in something, the same something that seemed to ooze over her clothes and make rivers in the cracks of the decaying wood underneath her feet. They shined like a lake under an unclouded moon even though the quivering candlelight was so dim. The teeth of their mask were jaggedly punched out, but what was behind it was unrecognizable.

They leaned in with either agitation or curiosity at her pauses. Probably both. The candle most between she and them suddenly flickered more brightly and curved away from this being, but just as quickly dimmed once more. Then again- bloomed, bent halfway, and withered back to almost nothing. A yellow blush was softly laid upon the hand that clasped on their knee for support, which was lowering to her level. Knuckles twitched in effort. A small shake of the cloth underneath- the ring finger tapping with anxiety, over and over. Tension trailed their arm up to their shoulders, which lifted and dropped delicately, hardly brushing an aura of dust that sprinkled the air. A highlight struck through the mask's crude window and exposed a parting of lips.

Bloom. Bend. Wither.

Bloom. Bend. Wither.

She...Oh god.

They were alive.

Her own life was struck like a match, enveloped with vigor. The minute rhythms before her blared over their shared memories. Her instincts ignored who this someone was. They're a person. A person.

Whatever she intended to ask was gone forever. Through all the obscurity that swallowed them, the most human question burned into her heart and skimmed over her tongue before she could censor herself.

"Do you have a name?"